'Shifting attitudes requires action on many fronts' - read Scope's new research now

13»

Comments

  • Maurice123
    Maurice123 Community member Posts: 111 Empowering
    I am probably going to be a bit controversial. I have found fully understandable comments by Kittycat amongst others showing how unreasonable the general public can be. However when I think about it I never meet the general public except in pubs. Everybody has been very pleasant to me and due to going on dating sites for the last six months I have now found two beautiful ladies who accept my disability and any man would be proud to have them as girlfriends.
    However when I discuss with the public why they have problems with disabled people. The answer is
    THEY ARE SO RUDE. For every person like Kittycat there are hundreds out there telling members of the public to clear off as they are perfectly capable of looking after themselves. Maybe they are but why should a well meaning member of the public offer to help and be subjected to a torrent of abuse. I suggest that disabled people start looking at themselves and not blaming the general public.
  • SueHeath
    SueHeath Community member Posts: 12,388 Championing
    Morning @Maurice123 good to see you and nice you have found two lady's to share your life with, have you meet up with either of them yet?
    I do agree with you on how some people take offence when you offer to help, i have witnessed this my self.
  • Maurice123
    Maurice123 Community member Posts: 111 Empowering
    @SueHeath
    Hi Sue, Thank you for your comment. I was not sure how my comment would be viewed on Scope. I think it must be hard not to become introspective and feel detached from the world around you as a disabled person. I also found the same attitude among blind men in particular.
  • Jules_H
    Jules_H Scope Member Posts: 61 Contributor
    I use a wheelchair and symbol cane, but as I don't have three hands, before I go out I have to decide if the sun is too bright am I going to be blinded so I can't see anything, so take my cane.. or if my spine and joints are so bad I can't manage to go anywhere without my chair. This one really bright day I went without the chair but by the time I reached the accessible checkout I was hanging off the trolley in pain. Even so, I noticed the guy with the guide dog behind me, how he had a lot less items than me, I asked if he wanted to go before me. His reply was "going by the shadow outline of you, you need to go first".

      Weeks later i, by chance, found out the guy with the guide dog runs a visually impaired bowls club in my area and have just had a special wheelchair donated for the bowls green. He put me in touch with the visual impairment team, whom I've been waiting since January to hear from. It's the first time I've had anyone with any kind of impairment go out of their way for me to that extent. 

    As for able-bodied, they do see me, they look straight at me, but their group chatter seems more important than just moving a little to one side. I've come home on  many occasion with a sore through from having to ask louder and louder if people could kindly move out of the way only to be ignored, so I've turned around and gone around the shopping aisle a different way.  I tend to get most of my shopping delivered now. 

      My doctor doesn't even know I'm partially sighted, he, I feel, treats me like I'm either exaggerating or making things up, so I stopped telling him things unless the pain becomes unbearable. As I saw on a social media post recently "I don't fake being ill, I fake being well". Many seem to think I'm faking spinal damage and loss of sight, from my ex husband (when I was married) to social services, hospitals and the general public. I know it's not the best solution for me, but I stopped interacting with people face to face and going out unless it's an appointment I can't miss.

Categories