Being a parent carer

Luna51

Hello lovely folk

Just popping in as I'm really struggling today.
I am sat here filling in a UC50 form for my youngest, I've done it before for our other daughter but finding it a challenge today, my hands are cold and my brain is foggy!
I am lacking the words (or thoughts) to put it all down on paper..
The trouble is it is all normal to me as it probably is for so many of us who care for loved ones, her difficulties are something we've always dealt with but to have to explain it all is tough, really tough and it makes me sad as her parent, I hate having to document everything that she struggles with, she's such a wonderful, kind young woman, she makes my heart leap with pride and joy!  - I wish I could write about that instead.. 😔

Biblioklept

No reason you can't say how wonderful and kind she is in there too I hope you manage to get through the fog and make some progress. All these forms are enough to drive someone potty!! 

Luna51

Thank you @Biblioklept
It's been fine filling it in up until now, I think the gloomy weather is playing its part too!
I have decided I'm going to buy her a pretty card when this is done and list everything I love about her (that's probably more for me than her) but she will still appreciate it.
I'll get through it, I always do, I guess we all have 'those' kind of days right.. 😉

Hannah_Alumni

Luna51 said:

Hello lovely folk

Just popping in as I'm really struggling today.
I am sat here filling in a UC50 form for my youngest, I've done it before for our other daughter but finding it a challenge today, my hands are cold and my brain is foggy!
I am lacking the words (or thoughts) to put it all down on paper..
The trouble is it is all normal to me as it probably is for so many of us who care for loved ones, her difficulties are something we've always dealt with but to have to explain it all is tough, really tough and it makes me sad as her parent, I hate having to document everything that she struggles with, she's such a wonderful, kind young woman, she makes my heart leap with pride and joy!  - I wish I could write about that instead.. 😔

Hello @Luna51

Sorry to hear you are struggling We all have days where the words just don't want to come out coherently. I found the same issue, you want them to know how strong she is. And with reading what you've written today, I bet she really is an amazing young woman

Remember to take breaks in between where you can, make sure you have a cuppa (that's essential) and if you have all the documents from the medical side to hand, maybe use how they describe it? 

Luna51

Thank you so much everyone

I took my girls out for a coffee and a change of scenery, which was lovely, hearing them both laughing in the back of the car was just what I needed! 
Our soppy cocker spaniel is currently sat on my lap and the I'm feeling so much better.
Back to it tomorrow!
Have a nice evening everyone and thanks again.. ☺️

Tori_Scope

That's lovely to hear @luna51 I hope you're all doing okay today!

Luna51

Tori_Scope said:

That's lovely to hear @luna51 I hope you're all doing okay today!

Hi @Tori_Scope

Thank you for your kind words, feeling much better today as I had a day off from form filling, so ready to tackle the it all again tomorrow.. 
Have a lovely weekend ☺️

poppy123456

I've only just seen this and didn't want to pass on by without commenting because i remember i've given some advice in your other threads.

I think one of the most difficult things to do is sit down and write/type the things our children struggle with. They may now be adults but they will always be our children, regardless of their age.

It comes natural to us to just do what we've always done and we carry on regardless, most of the time without giving it a 2nd thought. There will always be times when we struggle because we are only human after all.

When i fill out these forms for my daughter i do a very small amount at a time and then put it away until later. Sometimes i may not return back to it until the following day but i'm always thinking of things to write in the meantime. I always found making notes is helpful too. My internet access is my desktop computer and i'll have a sheet of paper next to me when i have a moment and i quickly write things down, when i have enough i'll add it to my PC until that question is answered. I then go onto to the next one.

When you're doing this try to think of some real world examples of exactly what happened the last time she attempted that activity and then add detailed information such as where she was, what exactly happened, did anyone see it and what the consequences were.

Most importantly of all don't forget about yourself, take some time out and look after yourself. Tomorrow is another day.

Luna51

Hi @poppy123456
Thank you for your kind words and sound advice, it's kind of good to know I'm not alone in feeling this way sometimes, but I do wish we all had a bit more understanding from the powers that be..
I hope you had a nice few days with your son - we had a BBQ at my daughter's new place on Saturday, her poor partner was cooking in the dark bless him!
We all really enjoyed the evening but decided it truly was the last BBQ of the year! 

Take care and thanks again 😊

L_Volunteer

You are welcome @Luna51. It is the very least you deserve.

I wish we had a bit more understanding from the powers too but you are never alone with us on Scope's forum. 

That sounds tricky that her partner was cooking in the dark. Something that would be quite comical if I tried! It sounds really positive that you managed to enjoy it though