Your Challenges with the Length and Number of Subjects involved in Community Posts.

Everyone in the Scope Community is very aware, of course of their limitations with their health condition(s)
I personally believe that with us only being able to write down what we want to express here, it can be a challenge to realize that the people you are friendly with and genuinely supportive of may be struggling with messaging back, as much as they want to do so, even though they are really looking forward to hearing from you.
This is not surprising, as around 80% of all communication between people is done by the observation of body language.
Writing to each other has great advantages, don't get me wrong but the other person who is messaging you will have little idea, despite the fact that that you really do want to hear from them, that you may be struggling with dealing with lengthy posts, with a lot of different subjects in them. This may also involve multiple posts of this kind from the same sender in a relatively short period of time.
In my case, with ME/CFS, anxiety and depression I'm at great risk of experiencing
Being overwhelmed
Being anxious
Having an increased lack of motivation
Being less able to do things that are vital to my basic functioning.
Having increased brain fog and lack of concentration.
Having an increase in already debilitating fatigue
Having an increase in already very reduced mobility
Having an even greater unawareness of my surroundings and what other people who are present say to me.
Having less time to spend having quality time with loved ones or enough time to deal with other things in life that are essential or are important to me.
Concern from loved ones that answering long, overly complicated messages is having a detrimental effect on my health condition and well being.
I'm sure that there is much you can relate to there from the increased problems I have with this situation, plus your own issues, due to your individual health conditions
I love being part of this community in every way. My favourite part of joining in here is being supportive of others, particularly when they are feeling down or struggling in some way and they say that I've been able to help them. This in turn does a great deal to uplift and support me in the same way.
This includes campaigning for change, particularly at the moment with the massive issue of proposals for huge welfare cuts.
Plus, just simply having a chat about things that are interesting to us or pleasantly passing the time of day with each other.
As you can see I have a tendency towards long posts but excessively long posts, containing many different subjects cause the above results, making me want to consider whether I want to be part of this community, where on the other hand, I know how deverstating it would be for me to leave it, on the other hand.
This would have a knock on effect on my regular involvement on the New Green Paper and the Get your MP to act against cuts Discussions where I know for a fact that others especially my great friend @noonebelieves would certainly miss my contribution to those conversations
What do you think about this?
Have you had this same situation with messages that others have sent to you?
Have you suffered in silence or ended your contact with someone who has quite unwittingly taken so much of your time and energy, that it has made you become upset and frustrated plus it has worsened your health condition, as you don't know how on earth you are going to tell them about what they are so innocently doing?
How has it made you feel?
My experience of this suggests that there must be others that have an issue with this and the problems it can cause, as I have come across it several times.
Would anyone be willing to speak up about this, for their sake and the sake of others who benefit from their support on this community, who are affected too?
Please do, if you can, as it's said a problem solved is a problem halved and with the lovely people on this community, I think that your input would be much appreciated and that you would not be disapproved of.
I believe that this may be a very valuable and much needed conversation.
Do you think I'm right?
My apologies as this post has had to be fairly long and involved lol to get the ball rolling, so to speak. Please aim to make your responses, not too long and to make them reasonably to the point or, of course, I'm afraid that I will struggle to deal with them!!
I look forward to hearing from you. 😊
Comments
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Hey Juls,
After reading your post, I’ve been sitting with your words for a while now, and I just want to start by saying how deeply sorry 😔 I am if anything I’ve shared has unintentionally contributed to how you’re feeling.
Reading your post truly broke my heart -I never, ever want to be a source of overwhelm, especially to someone who means so much to me and has been such a trusted friend and fellow voice in this space .
You’ve always been a guiding light in this community-not just in the campaigns, but in the way you lift others up with so much empathy and grace. I know how much strength it must have taken to write what you did, and I admire that honesty. I hear you, Juls-really hear you and I want you to know I completely respect what you’ve shared. truly…. Every ounce of it!❤️👏
It hurts to think that my long, voice-dictated posts-written with the best intentions to inform, empower, and stand with our Scope community through our collective voices in the predicament we currently face-may have had an unintended effect on your health. I feel ashamed, truly, and I ask from the bottom of my heart: please forgive me if I’ve added to your burden in any way. That was never my intention.
I would never want you to feel pressured or unwell because of anything I’ve sent. Your wellbeing matters more than any post or reply ever could. Please know there’s zero expectation from me, and if a message ever feels like too much-just leave it.Yes, and I truly mean it ! What matters is that you look after you.
You’re irreplaceable here, Juls. Not just for what you contribute, but for who you are.If I’ve misunderstood your post or projected my own guilt too much, I hope you’ll see that it’s only because I care. Our virtual friendship means the world to me and I’ll always be here, cheering you on, in whatever way feels right for you.
With so much heartfelt care🤗
Sam1 -
Dear Sam
PLEASE, PLEASE don't beat yourself up about what I said. 🙏
You do not have to apologise either. It's not your fault, it's not ANYONE'S fault, it's because I have the health conditions I do. 😊 They dictate what happens to me, I only have limited control over it!!
You're right, it did take a lot of courage to write that post simply because I knew that I would get a post back from you about it to rend my heart 💔 because I DO know that you really care and I DO NOT want to hurt such a good friend, like you!
It's totally unintentional on your part I know, can't our ill health cause so many unnecessary problems!! Additional problems that we could well do without! 😔
I've already had two experiences of this same problem. They again, didn't know they were doing anything but being friendly either.
I was in a real bind wondering what to say or do as I DO NOT under any circumstances want to lose our friendship so I thought of creating my own discussion about it as I didn't want to raise the subject with you with everyone looking in on the two busy threads we are usually on.
I might get some responses apart from you but I doubt it.
As far as I'm concerned, all that's changed is that I ask that your posts aren't so long and there are not as many subjects. I feel rotten now but unfortunately, it did need to be said and I did not want other people to see that, as I didn't want to embarrass you. There is nowhere to put a private conversation unfortunately. 😞
I do hope that you will be alright with all this. I think that you will be. I feel that I should be the one to apologise Sam, not you!! 🙏
With so much heartfelt care sent back to you. 🫶 Julia
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can you not private chat then
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Dear Julia ,
Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful message-it truly means a lot. I can honestly say it brought a huge sense of relief and comfort, knowing that our friendship still stands strong 💪🏼💪🏼despite the awkwardness of the situation. 😊
Please don’t feel bad or worry about saying what needed to be said. I completely understand where you’re coming from, and I deeply appreciate the way you approached it-with such grace and care.
You’ve absolutely nothing to apologise for. On the contrary, I admire your honesty and the way you’ve balanced your health needs with such compassion for others. It says so much about your heart.
I’m genuinely grateful for our connection here, Juls. I’ll take everything you’ve said to heart and will try my very best to keep my posts simpler and lighter from now on.
Sending lots of warmth and respect your way,🙏🏼🤗
Sam
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Good call!
Unfortunately , I don’t think there’s that option, unless triggered by Scope Admin.
It would’ve been ideal in this scenario!
Best Wishes!
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Hi @noonebelieves you can private message by clicking the envelope at the top of the page and then click on the square box with a pen in it. Take care.
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Dear Sam
I'm so relieved that that our friendship is still sound too, I really am. 😌 You have sent me, not one but two lovely messages, I am so grateful to you considering the difficult circumstances they came about under.
I was still wondering if I'd gone about that message in the wrong way, but you have now convinced me by your very kind words that I actually went about it the right way. I thought that I was going to continue feeling guilty about it but you have reassured me that I don't need to worry about that.
I truly treasure our connection on here too and I'm completely sure that you will modify your posts appropriately. I have no doubt about that.
Thank you for being so understanding of me and my health condition. And for being such a very genuine and caring friend.
Sending you my very best wishes. 🧚🤗
Julia 😊
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Thanks so much! That’s really good to know -it just worked this time😳.
When I tried earlier, it didn’t, so I thought it was blocked by admin .
Definitely something to bear in mind for the future-it would offer a bit of privacy & space for sensitive chats like this.Have a nice evening
Best wishes!
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Many thanks @Bluebell21 I'm really grateful to you!! 😃I see that @noonebelieves is too.
All the best and take care. 😊
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