Friend looking into supported living needs advice

wandering_chris · August 16

Hi everyone,

A friend of mine is currently looking into supported living and would really appreciate hearing from people who have experience of it.

One of the things he is trying to understand is what day-to-day life is actually like. How does the daily routine work? How much say do you have over your own day, and how much freedom do you have to come and go as you please?

For example, he is religious and attends a place of worship. Would he generally be able to go out independently or with appropriate support to attend Friday evening services, or are there restrictions around leaving the accommodation at certain times?

Another important question for him is feeling safe and being able to be himself. He has experienced prejudice in the past because of his identity, so he wants to know how supported living providers deal with situations where someone may be open about their identity but is concerned about experiencing discrimination or hostility.

How safe and supported have people felt being open about who they are in supported living? And what should someone ask a provider about their approach to equality, discrimination and personal safety before deciding whether a placement is right for them?

Any experiences or advice would be really appreciated. Thanks!

Wandering Chris

surfygoose · August 16

Hi, I live in residential care and lots of my friends live in supported livings. Me and my friends are all allowed out when we want. Whether our staff come with us or not depends on our care needs. Those that are safe independently can do that and if we are not safe then our staff accompamy us.

I attend church and staff have always happily taken me to services and bible study and events. I am Christian. Some of our staff are Christian, some Muslim, some Hindu and some atheists. All of the staff are respectful of my faith and support me to attend the events that are important to me, even if they do not share the same faith.

There is the option to do activities and outings alongside other residents, with two or three residents and two or three staff all going somewhere together like bowling or cinema or crazy golf, or anything else people enjoy. It is in no way mandatory though. Residents only share activities if they are friends and are choosing to spend time together.

Residents enjoy pursuing their own interests and go out to their own activties with their staff. The same goes for going on holiday. I do not cope with change and so I choose to not go on a holiday. A couple of other residents enjoy going together on holiday, with their staff. Other residents prefer to go on holiday just with their member of staff and without other residents. People choose where they want to go and staff support them to make it happen.

Staff can support residents to save up for things they enjoy and to make good budgeting decisions. For some people their family manages their money for them instead. Others manage their own money.

Thre isn't a curfew or a bedtime. The only consideration is if you need staff with you when you are out and you are attending something late at night, there are less staff on the night shift. Staff will stay late to take you to those things but you just need to make sure to ask in advance so that staffing can be sorted out.

I hooe that is helpful and I hope your friend finds a nice home.

surfygoose · August 16

I agree with what you are saying SheffieldMan. It doesn’t matter about the label of whether it is a supported living or a care home, it is how well the place is managed and what the staff are like that makes the difference.

surfygoose · August 16

Wandering_Chris, tell your friend to ask lots of questions when he looks round his prospective new home. Get a feel for the place. Don’t feel pressured in to saying yes to the very first option.

ChrisR777 · August 16

I have recently been wondering about residential care, it seems to have happened all of a sudden, I look around, but can't put my finger on when I reached near the tipping point.

Bluebell21 · August 16

Hi @ChrisR777 perhaps it is the pain you are in all of the time that has highlighted the residential care idea?

Perhaps have a look online and see what is available in your area.

The only problem would be Gus, would anyone be able to have him for you and you could visit every couple of days?

Big decision.

ChrisR777 · August 16

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1144862#Comment_1144862

Of course we would be talking post Gus, he is 8yo and won't be around all that much longer. I doubt I meet the criteria just yet anyway.

ChrisR777 · August 16

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1144865#Comment_1144865

In my area, there appear to be many very elderly and disabled people kept in their homes, with multiple visits from council carers every day. Maybe there aren't as many care homes here as in Sheffield?

Friend looking into supported living needs advice

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