Are we getting worse at talking to each other?

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  • Rag_793
    Rag_793 Community Member Posts: 841 Empowering

    I fired up Facebook again yesterday alongside Messenger. Sent a friend a message to say “Are You Ok” He read it and didn’t reply. Later I sent a message along the lines of I screwed up cutting you and another friend off, that I had another breakdown and that I shut down and push people away, I added that I understand why both he and another friend would not want to speak to me let alone see me, if that was the case then I understand and wish you the best for the coming years. Again read and ghosted. This is a bad habit he has had for as long as I have known him. I have given up tonight and deleted the message, if he wants to reach out then he can message me.

  • Rag_793
    Rag_793 Community Member Posts: 841 Empowering


    Look mucker, I know what it is like battling Autism. I have been battling it since the 1980’s, it is a brutal thing to live with and it is so hard as an adult to be diagnosed with it now in your 40s. I am here for you mate, both with advice for Autism, Mental Health and DWP. I worked as a Support Worker for 8 years which gives me a unique perspective seeing it from the person battling mental health. It also as someone who cared for people with mental health disabilities. I am here anytime day or night if you want to talk, laugh, scream, cry or just say want to grab a coffee and I’ll sort a time to jump on a train and meet up with you. Been mates for 26 years, times have gone very fast, so fast I’ve lost most of my hair. I honestly can’t apologise enough that I just went dark earlier in the year, when I have a lot of things hit me at once I implode and self destruct, instead of reaching out to both you and X to talk which I should of done.


    this is a message I sent to a friend last night, does it come across as confrontational…

  • Rosie_Scope
    Rosie_Scope Posts: 9,819 Scope online community team

    I don't think so @Rag_793, sounds quite supportive to me. Hope they feel able to get back to you at some point ☺️

  • StarryEyed
    StarryEyed Community Member Posts: 2,067 Championing

    @Rag_793 I'm sorry you've been ghosted. You're making me think that's a perfect subtopic within this topic of "are we getting worse at talking to eachother?" The subtopic is the cancel culture, where people cancel or ghost people the moment they're uncomfortable. So, I answer a strong yes that people have become really bad at talking for resolving conflicts. I have always hated conflicts and try to avoid them, but now that typically people around me avoid conflicts too, the problem has really escalated. So I'm now learning how to deal with conflict. But you can't force someone to talk. Even encouragement falls on deaf ears if someone has already made up their mind. I wonder what others think about this.

  • Rag_793
    Rag_793 Community Member Posts: 841 Empowering

    very true, with me living on my own and having nobody local to me who I know it makes things hard. I have family in Oldham who I haven’t seen or spoken to since 2015, two ex wives behind me and friends that have decided they didn’t want to remain friends with me since my split from my ex in 2023. The two mates I had left, I sadly just stopped contact due to my mental health being in a bad place and haven’t spoken to them in 8 months. I tried opening contact with one friend but my number is blocked and the other friend has just decided to ghost me. Both of my friends are both going through there own battles with mental health, but unlike me they have family and friends around them to support them. They are able to function with their mental health, whereas I am the opposite as it paralyses me and can leave me in bed for days at a time.

  • Rag_793
    Rag_793 Community Member Posts: 841 Empowering

    Well looks like communication does work 😀 speaking to my mate from Stockport tonight, my other friend is ok just having to bide his time due his mental health I think.

  • Rosie_Scope
    Rosie_Scope Posts: 9,819 Scope online community team

    That sounds positive @Rag_793 ☺️ hope it goes well for you!

  • StarryEyed
    StarryEyed Community Member Posts: 2,067 Championing

    That's awesome @Rag_793. Triple yay! 🤸🏼‍♀️😊

  • WhatThe
    WhatThe Community Member, Scope Member Posts: 6,456 Championing

    These days, I probably talk to more people I don't know than any I do!

    My landline still receives calls and voicemail but I no longer spend hours talking to friends or family on the phone and I only use my mobile for texts. Other people stopped using landlines and calls from mobiles especially on loudspeaker are horrendous for me and are limited where possible.

    I was an embarrassing mum to my teen @Anhedonia2 🤣 perhaps the baby set forces us to approach strangers - it certainly did me.

  • Rachel_Scope
    Rachel_Scope Posts: 5,417 Scope online community team

    How did it go with your friend @Rag_793?

  • egiste2r
    egiste2r Posts: 287 Connected

    Like an old dinosaur, I am used to talking by voice on the phone, instant messengers, and the like. Text communication takes all the attention and at the same time it is impossible to drive a car, e-scooter, cook food, for example.

  • Rachel_Scope
    Rachel_Scope Posts: 5,417 Scope online community team

    I like to use Whatsapp voice notes @egiste2r as sometimes I struggle to type. You can actually transcribe them now too! I like hearing my friends voice without having the commitment of having a phone call so I can still get other things done.

  • Rag_793
    Rag_793 Community Member Posts: 841 Empowering

    Hi Rachel, it went great thank you. Going to be speaking again tonight

  • Rachel_Scope
    Rachel_Scope Posts: 5,417 Scope online community team

    That's fantastic news @Rag_793! I'm so happy it went well. I hope you have a great chat tonight too 😊

  • egiste2r
    egiste2r Posts: 287 Connected

    transcribe…. Don't feed the troll Big Brother

    😎