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What does pain and depression look like?

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  • adhdbird1980
    adhdbird1980 Community member Posts: 7 Listener
    Hugs Charlene I have severe depression and anxiety and it’s horrible makes my life a living nightmare i have so much other issues also it’s hard also with your daughter my brother got sectioned it’s the best thing that could of happened to him as he was diagnosed with schizophrenia. hoping you both get the right help needed to make life easier :)
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 1,741 Listener
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  • Waylay
    Waylay Community member, Scope Member Posts: 973 Pioneering
    Wow, I hope you don't mind that I'm writing a small novel here. I've now been awake for 2 days, I'm oddly hyperactive, and it's 5:15AM, so I have nothing else to do. ;)

    I was diagnosed with Borderline by a CBT therapist after she'd seen me once (supposed to be something only a psychiatrist can diagnose!) I went and read up on it, and I had a few of the symptoms (a couple of them were worse when I was younger), but it just didn't make sense to me. I asked her to lay out her reasons for the diagnosis. She said:
    1) I'd been abused in childhood. (This is not a symptom, it's a possible cause. Many people are abused in childhood, sadly, but they don't all end up with BPD)
    2) I'd self-harmed in the past (Self-harm occurs in other mental illnesses too, not just in BPD)
    3) I had "grandiose" ideas about myself. (? My self-loathing  self-criticism is legendary. ****? She'd asked me if I thought I was more intelligent than an average person, and I said yes. I wasn't being grandiose, though; I have two degrees in Geophysics from one of the top 5 unis in the world, did really well at work, and then my boss paid for me to do a PhD at another of the top 5 unis. I'm not a genius, but I'm pretty smart - at least, before the fibro-fog. ;) *shrug*)
    4) We had a limited number of sessions together, and I've done a lot of therapy, so I showed up to the first meeting with a couple of papers laying out my MH history, my family's issues, meds I'd taken, when I'd had MDD episodes, etc. She decided that I was manipulating her, when I was just trying to be efficient with the time we had!
    5) Lastly, she decided that I was promiscuous and that I engaged in impulsive risky sex. (I think I'd had sex with 10 people at the time, and I was 35 - not exactly the **** of Babylon. But as you said, it's all opinion, isn't it? I suspect that promiscuous is an adjective applied to anyone who's had more sex than her. ;) She decided that because I'm polyamorous I clearly engaged in impulsive risky sex. I had to explain what polyamory was to her, so it's not like she had a clue about it. In fact, all the poly people I know are extremely strict about getting tested before they sleep with a new partner, always practice safer sex, if a condom breaks wait 2 months and get tested before sleeping with any other partners, etc. The idea of giving your monogamous partner an STI is pretty horrid, but the idea of giving a poly partner an STI, and they give it to their other partner, who gives it to.... OK, it'd be unlikely to spread like that, but you'd still have to tell everyone, and they'd all have to stop having sex until they got tested, and they'd all worry.... Multiple studies have shown that compared to monogamous people poly people get fewer STI's, despite sleeping with more people. I told her this. I even brought in one of the papers the next week. Nope. Risky impulsive **** was my diagnosis. Oops. I mean BPD. ;) )
  • charlene
    charlene Community member Posts: 555 Pioneering
    Victoriad , I think it could be Desmond Morris, the naked ape.
    When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
  • charlene
    charlene Community member Posts: 555 Pioneering
    Thanks adhdbird, I hope things improve  for you two.  Whatever happens to our loved ones, is bound to effect us, we'll that is what I think.

    looking after my husband took its toll on my health, and what has happened in the years since.  Thank goodness when I was young I never knew what the future held. It breaks my heart what has happened to my beautiful daughter.  There again I still have a daughter, my brother and sister-in-law lost one of their's.
    When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
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  • CockneyRebel
    CockneyRebel Community member Posts: 5,209 Disability Gamechanger
    Thats great thanks for posting
    ( now where can we post it for HCP's and DM's to read )
    Be all you can be, make  every day count. Namaste
  • [Deleted User]
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  • CockneyRebel
    CockneyRebel Community member Posts: 5,209 Disability Gamechanger
    SPLASH :)
    Be all you can be, make  every day count. Namaste
  • [Deleted User]
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  • sandyp196
    sandyp196 Community member Posts: 142 Pioneering
    The thing is, you get diagnosed with a serious mental health condition by a psychiatrist taking a guess in 20 minutes (as in my case). So that's that. A diagnosis. But what happens next is unbelievable.  
    Loads of strong medication. 
    If you report it makes you unwell there are 2 options which are 'persevere' or 'let's switch one or two out' . 

    I complained for years and years the meds weren't working and actually made me worse. I am worse. I had a nasty habit of hitting a bad phase mentally and stopping the meds myself. This was usually put me in hospital and a few times a police station, and 2 occasions a holding cell in 5h3 police stations.  Iv been banned from local shops, pubs and even buses, and one taxi rank. All this limits my world even more.  
    But every single time I stopped those meds I was accused of not engaging with support and not being responsible towards my well being. 
    I got blamed for it all and one doctor refused to have me on his patient list anymore because of my 'engagement' issues. 
    I'm now rediagnosed. I refused to accept the first diagnosis and have only accepted it on a second opinion. Plus the new meds seem to be working so I can assume from that I'm finally on the right meds for the right illness.  Bt I have been treated bad and because I was deemed as having bipolar, any resistance I voiced towards the medication or my treatment was put down as a symptom of bipolar!!!  Because I had a mental health condition I wasn't deemed sane enough to make decisions or assessments on my own condition. 
    All of this happened because of one 20 minute assesment. 8 years of my life robbed from me and god knows what the long term effects of those medications are. 
    My family are persuing it through legal channels.  I don't want any money or compensation and we haven't complained in thay way. We jsut want to make sure doctor cannot do this to people, or at least make follow up assesments a requirement of any initial assessment to make sure a person actually has the illness doctors are drugging them for!


  • whistles
    whistles Community member Posts: 1,583 Disability Gamechanger
    I had similar in that the MH issues that sprung up were looked at but the neurological side wasnt supported.
    I had a life changing accident at 15, breakdown at 17.
    Ooh that's bound to be her childhood, drugs, adolescense.
    No you silly turds, you've just split me in half and focused totally on my mind, that's in turmoil right now. 
    Psychiatrists are textbook trained and if you fit a box, it's an MH issue- not saying I didn't have issues but my life had just been turned inside out- anyone would have!!
    Do not follow me, I don't know where I am going.
  • [Deleted User]
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  • whistles
    whistles Community member Posts: 1,583 Disability Gamechanger
    I will wait for it to come out online @Victoriad
    Absolutely get other opinions on your health and keep pushing until you feel assured. I know it’s hard finding the energy for it but it’s your very peace of mind, pardon the pun.
    Do you think it can be back ordered off Amazon?
    Do not follow me, I don't know where I am going.
  • [Deleted User]
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  • whistles
    whistles Community member Posts: 1,583 Disability Gamechanger
    Just an aside if some of you are interested in films.
    'I, Daniel Blake' is a very moving film about a 59 year old man trying to get ESA, and the appeal process.
    I sometimes wonder if people in the dwp should watch it because there must be hundreds of people who know what this film is like to live with. And others who wonder how your life could get to this point- so so easily! 
    Do not follow me, I don't know where I am going.
  • [Deleted User]
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  • whistles
    whistles Community member Posts: 1,583 Disability Gamechanger
    Victoriad said:
    Hello @debbiedo49
    I just look upon a diagnosis as an opinion....

    Opinions are like a*** holes......EVERYONES’ got one!

    And unfortunately, some a***holes have opinions :)

    CR
    I talk and fart out of mine.  :)
    Do not follow me, I don't know where I am going.
  • whistles
    whistles Community member Posts: 1,583 Disability Gamechanger
    edited April 2018
    Victoriad said:
    There is a book just out about the power of the pharmaceutical industry and it’s unsavoury and stronger links to psychiatry.......I think I read a review about it in the Times newspaper.......

    Ill see if I can find the title and let you know as I will see if library will stock it on a book request.

    Only thing is I used to speed read books but unable to now as I have to revisit what I read the chapter previously before commencing again.

    Its like one gear forward and two gears backwards.

    What I have noticed lately is some of my meds change suppliers. Now yes thats to keep costs down, but it has made me wonder why all of a sudden one is giving me adverse effects. 
    Using coffee as a rubbish example if you buy ASDA's own it's coffee and cheaper as oppose to a named expensive brand. But, they use different beans, different processes. So taste and effect is different.
    Ps nescafe gold decafe is passable as a decafe. Use one a day as a test and it lasts a while. 
    Do not follow me, I don't know where I am going.

Brightness

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