Have you ever felt excluded? - Page 3 — Scope | Disability forum
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Have you ever felt excluded?

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  • selkie
    selkie Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi ali,  i know exactly what you mean, but i am sorry we are both stuck in the same boat. I found wearing a lanyard with a laminated card both of which i bought from the hearing web site tucked under my jumper and jacket ready to whip out as necessary helps me a lot, saves lengthy explanations and seems to help people understand. Please dont get isolated,  its so very hard i know, but its even harder to restart mixing again in my experience. I find my hearing aids a relief now - i can turn them off in very noisy surroundings and back on when i need to listen. The little card asks people to to look at me when they are speaking so that i can lip read. Where would we be without our furbabies, bless their furry paws. Such lovely company and always happy for a cuddle. Xx

  • uruloki
    uruloki Community member Posts: 12 Listener
    So sorry to see how badly you have both been treated, you deserve better. Don't let the ignorance grind you down. 
  • alibongo51
    alibongo51 Community member Posts: 37 Courageous
    good morning.hi uriloki,thank you.i try my hardest.hope your ok :)   ...hi selkie,so true,hes such a lifesaver,helped me get out of the flat after id had a stroke.can manage little walks with him?...i cant have hearing aid as i have ongoing infections in both ears.im always getting them cleaned at hospital(supposed to be every 4 weeks)but that never happens ?plus bad tinnitus in both ears at same too! anyway i wont waffle on.take care both n hope you have good day :)
  • selkie
    selkie Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi ali and uruloki,  thank u from me too for your wise words. Ali i really do feel for you,  its hard enough living with health conditions without suffering exclusion on top. If i were you i would wear the heaing lanyard anyway, even if it just has the advice card attached to it.
    Just a thought, we three (at least) are not excluded anymore - we have each other and we have scope. Xx
  • alibongo51
    alibongo51 Community member Posts: 37 Courageous
    we do,its nice to know people are there for each other.ill look into it,thanks hun.?
  • selkie
    selkie Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    My pleasure and its lovely to 'meet' you both. I'm sending big, gentle hugs. Xx
  • alibongo51
    alibongo51 Community member Posts: 37 Courageous
    likewise hugs back n a big lick from furbaby?take care xx
  • selkie
    selkie Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Thank you, you too. ? xx
  • Nidge99
    Nidge99 Community member Posts: 3 Listener
    Yes my daughter has a hidden disabilities and learning disability she has often wanted to improve herself her when asking about college courses has been turned down has her grades are to low when doing the excess tests required it's so frustrating for her as she considers herself able not disable 
  • Lettybabe
    Lettybabe Community member Posts: 4 Listener
    I think most people have hit the nail on the head of the question should be when haven't you felt excluded. Personally I have always felt excluded because people don't understand me, I have many medical conditions these being ADHD, APD, Narcolepsy, fibromyalgia, hypersensitivity, anxiety, depression, PTSD and dissasociative disorder. People have never understood me anyway because I have a unique way of thinking... I can't feel emotions without a logical reason to do so. But more recently I have felt let down by the NHS as have many others on this thread. At the start of this year I started actively trying to kill myself and was under the support of the crisis team for about a week because apparently I having a family member living close to me means they don't need to help. After getting through that but still actively self harming when things get too much I self referred to the mental health team. I had an assessment 2 months later and they had to transfer me to the community mental health team so that they can assess me too and refer me to a psychotherapist for EMDR however they called me recently to say the wait list is over a year long and in the meantime all they will do is have someone call me every few months to make sure I haven't killed myself. I can't be the only person that thinks that this system is broken and people like myself that suffer from severe PTSD find ourselves waiting years just to have an assessment interview. For me personally I find that when my PTSD acts up I have to lie in my bathtub (while its empty) fully clothed crying and trying my hardest not to injure myself. It's so severe that I sleep with a knife now so I feel safe and most of the time I have to sleep with all of the lights and the TV on otherwise I freak out. If anyone knows of any charities that could assist with getting me EMDR therapy sooner to combat my PTSD I would really appreciate the help ?
  • uruloki
    uruloki Community member Posts: 12 Listener
    Is your ptsd from serving in the forces? If so contact saafa they can help with almost anything. 
  • Sam_Alumni
    Sam_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,671 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Lettybabe
    I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with so much and I can understand how frustrated you must feel right now, mental health services seem to be under so much strain and many members have talked about how long the waiting lists are to access any support.

    MIND say: 

    The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) website has an extensive A–Z of therapeutic approaches. This list covers many types of therapy by name, and explains the different beliefs and approaches behind each one.

    Unfortunately it's very common to have to spend time on a waiting list before getting therapy through the NHS. While you're on a waiting list it might help to:
    • Ask your doctor to give you a contact number to ring to check how long you have to wait.
    Our page on facing and overcoming barriers to seeking help gives more suggestions.
    Some community and charity sector organisations may offer free or low-cost talking therapies. For example:
    • Anxiety UK offers talking therapies for anxiety. There is a fee but they do offer reduced costs for people on a low income.
    See our page on seeking help through the third sector for more information. Some charities also provide telephone listening and emotional support services. These are not counselling or therapy, but can be helpful if you need to talk to someone in between sessions.

    You can also contact @Samaritans who offer emotional support. They can listen to you and help you talk through your concerns worries and troubles. You can also call Samaritans at any time, for free on 116 123. If you don’t feel like talking you can also email them jo@samaritans.org

    If you feel you are at immediate risk of harming yourself you can call 999 or go to your local Accident and emergency department for treatment.

    Please take care, and I hope you get the help you need. 

    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • Danny1980
    Danny1980 Community member Posts: 3 Listener
    I have a condition called AOS Adam & Oliver Syndrome which affects limb growth. I have one leg and a few missing fingers on each hand. I didn't receive any help until I was 21 (now 39). My parents arranged for a specialist doctor to come to their house where I was living at the time for him to asses my disability. Shortly after his visit I received DLA. There was no back payment from birth just a back payment from when it was applied from. My parents over the years kept applying and got refused any help over and over again. 

    I have all my life felt like I was a 2nd class citizen. I have been ignored, under valued, name called, looked at like I have 3 heads and I have had to really fight to fit in where able bodied people take this for granted. 

    Recently at work I was sat at my desk one morning where I over heard my manager and her team leaders talking about Jeremy Beadle. They were mimicking his hands and laughing about his disability like it was acceptable to do so.
    So after the team meeting I asked my team leader for a private chat. When we sat down to talk she could see I was mortified. I was shaking with anger and sadness, I had tears in my eyes and tried so hard not to break down in front of her. When asked what was wrong I explained what had happened and she kept saying sorry as she knew what had happened was wrong! I explained to her that if they had been talking about people who were gay or black etc that it would not be tolerated so why is it tolerated if you are disabled? She agreed it was wrong!
    After I composed myself I went back to my desk to get on with my work. Shortly after I saw my team leader take the manager and other team leaders into a meeting room to discuss what had happened. When they came out nothing was mentioned. There was no apology and still to this day nothing, which upsets me daily to the point were I want to quit my job.

    The above is just one time I have been unfairly treated, there has been many more in my life. What makes this whole situation ridiculous is that anyone can become disabled at anytime through accidents and illnesses. Everyone's children have a chance of being born disabled and still this madness continues! I have seen massive improvements over my life with racism, women's rights, gay rights, human rights and many more rightly so too but very very little with disability rights! What is going on? Something needs to give.........
  • clarkjohnson
    clarkjohnson Community member Posts: 210 Pioneering
    Well I've learnt life ain't a bunch of roses that's quite obvious from the accounts I've heard from people on this site in fact it's made me feel a little guilty about myself since my illness I slipped into the me me me syndrome when it should be us us us happy Valentine's Day to you all ❤️
  • uruloki
    uruloki Community member Posts: 12 Listener
    It saddens me to see these posts, I am now volunteering for ex forces charities as a case worker to provide anything to people who served, this includes household accessible aids, furniture and also mental health needs, one thing I am driving forward is a system of social events via membership funding so that people can feel included and give them a sense of hope. 
  • Piglets12
    Piglets12 Community member Posts: 17 Connected
    I am excluded in a lot of things even though i good enough i feel i not because of eclusion in a lot of areas.

Brightness