13 Year old needs help for mother — Scope | Disability forum
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13 Year old needs help for mother

amira768
amira768 Community member Posts: 26 Connected
Hi everyone, hope all is well.

My name is Amira, I am from The Netherlands. I am 13 years old, becoming 14 in March. My mom has been dealing with chronic back pain for about 3/4 years now. I really need help. If anyone recognizes the symptoms im about to describe, please reply.

She has upper back pain, the level of pain depends on the day. But, the days where she feels "good" are rare. In 4 years I think ive only seen 2 days where her pain was very little.

The amount of pain also changes during the day, she could feel bad in the morning but then the pain could lessen in the afternoon and then become worse again in the evening. She sometimes feels a lot of pain on the right side of her back, and the other day the left side could hurt way more. Sometimes she even does not have any pain on one side of her back, but then the same side could be killing her the next day. So her pain is kinda irregular.

 She has tried all kinds of pain medications and therapies, but nothing worked so far. Please tell me if I need to provide more info. If anyone has some (general) suggestions as to what to do, please tell me. And if anyone recognizes these symptoms please tell me as well. Thank you.
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Comments

  • kami24
    kami24 Community member Posts: 402 Pioneering
    It could be sciatica or arthritis even as my dad has it chronic when he was about 38 although it was due to his physical job he did but he did get over it seeing a psysiotherapist so I definitely recommend that and you can get funding for this on the nhs or through the doctors surgery you belong to. This is the nhs guide on back pain https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/back-pain/
    And they may have more details and help lines on there. If you are suffering mentally because of this then there are always people that can support you and your family -
    https://m.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100028264426995&ref=content_filter

    And the mind website have useful helplines and info
  • kami24
    kami24 Community member Posts: 402 Pioneering
    edited January 2021
    <moderator removed - medical advice not allowed>
  • kami24
    kami24 Community member Posts: 402 Pioneering
    edited January 2021
    <moderator removed - medical advice not allowed>
  • kami24
    kami24 Community member Posts: 402 Pioneering
    edited January 2021
    <moderator removed - medical advice not allowed>
  • Lisatho11987777
    Lisatho11987777 Scope Member Posts: 5,911 Disability Gamechanger
    You should realy get in touch with a doctor as we aren't medical professionals  and we shouldn't be telling you whst medication your mum should take in case of allergic reaction not really  knowing what is wrong and what other medication she is on 

  • Lisatho11987777
    Lisatho11987777 Scope Member Posts: 5,911 Disability Gamechanger
    @chiarieds could you help please 
  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,550 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 2021

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    “This is my simple religion. No need for temples. No need for complicated philosophy. Your own mind, your own heart is the temple. Your philosophy is simple kindness.” 
    ― Dalai Lama XIV

  • Lisatho11987777
    Lisatho11987777 Scope Member Posts: 5,911 Disability Gamechanger
    @leeCal thank you I have flagged the post 
  • chiarieds
    chiarieds Community member Posts: 16,007 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 2021
    Hi @amira768 - welcome to the community, & thank you for joining. You are an amazing young person reaching out to help your Mom. As has been mentioned above, we cannot diagnose, nor suggest medication, as we are not doctors. Your Mom's doctors are in the best position to help her, as they know her medical history, and what might help.
    There are some things that might help; in the UK we have pain clinics, that help people who have pain every day. Do you have something similar in the Netherlands? Sometimes other things help like listening to music, watching a good film, reading, drawing....anything your Mom likes that might take her mind off the pain.
    Everyone here is very kind and friendly, and you are so very welcome to come and talk to us any time. It would be lovely to hear about you, as well as how much you are trying to help your Mom.
    I am sorry that one person above was sending you inappropriate information. Everyone else would like to help and support you as much as we can. Hoping to hear from you again, with my best wishes to you and your Mom. :)
  • Lisatho11987777
    Lisatho11987777 Scope Member Posts: 5,911 Disability Gamechanger
    @chiarieds sorry I was worried thats why I tagged you  
  • chiarieds
    chiarieds Community member Posts: 16,007 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 2021
    No problem @lisathomas50 - I was doing a somewhat lengthy reply on another post, so didn't see your tag for a little while. Just hoping we hear from this lovely young person again, & she hasn't been put off by kami's posts. You did the right thing in flagging it.
  • amira768
    amira768 Community member Posts: 26 Connected
    chiarieds said:
    Hi @amira768 - welcome to the community, & thank you for joining. You are an amazing young person reaching out to help your Mom. As has been mentioned above, we cannot diagnose, nor suggest medication, as we are not doctors. Your Mom's doctors are in the best position to help her, as they know her medical history, and what might help.
    There are some things that might help; in the UK we have pain clinics, that help people who have pain every day. Do you have something similar in the Netherlands? Sometimes other things help like listening to music, watching a good film, reading, drawing....anything your Mom likes that might take her mind off the pain.
    Everyone here is very kind and friendly, and you are so very welcome to come and talk to us any time. It would be lovely to hear about you, as well as how much you are trying to help your Mom.
    I am sorry that one person above was sending you inappropriate information. Everyone else would like to help and support you as much as we can. Hoping to hear from you again, with my best wishes to you and your Mom. :)
    I dont really understand what happened. Thank you for your support tho. Do I need to take down the post? Im worried that I said something wrong. Please tell me if I need to take the post down.
  • amira768
    amira768 Community member Posts: 26 Connected
    You should realy get in touch with a doctor as we aren't medical professionals  and we shouldn't be telling you whst medication your mum should take in case of allergic reaction not really  knowing what is wrong and what other medication she is on 

    I understand. Thank you. I wasnt really looking for medication advice, but rather searching for someone that recognizes these symptoms and has any idea what this could be. Since doctors dont do anything, I thought I could just ask for help online. But I now see why it is wrong, thanks.
  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,550 Disability Gamechanger
    Don’t worry @amira768 you didn’t do anything wrong at all, we’re just not supposed to give medical advice, but you didn’t ask for medical advice so it’s okay. ?

    “This is my simple religion. No need for temples. No need for complicated philosophy. Your own mind, your own heart is the temple. Your philosophy is simple kindness.” 
    ― Dalai Lama XIV

  • Lisatho11987777
    Lisatho11987777 Scope Member Posts: 5,911 Disability Gamechanger
    @amira768 don't worry  just don't follow the medication advice as @chiarieds said we are friendly people  do you look after your mum  it must be difficult to see your mum suffering  we wouldn't know whst is wrong with your mum but she needs medical help  if she is in so much pain 

    Is there just you and your mum  do you have any brothers or sisters  is your dad with you aswel 

    Are you ok  @chiarieds maybe be able to help a bit more don't worry 
  • chiarieds
    chiarieds Community member Posts: 16,007 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi again @amira768 - as @leeCal said we cannot give medical advice which kamir unfortunately gave, and may not help your Mom as she does not know your Mom's medical history like her doctors will do. You did not do a thing wrong, honestly. You looking for help is certainly not wrong, but even if someone feels they know the symptoms your Mom has, we cannot say, as we cannot know for sure. I hope you understand.
    You certainly can ask for help, but we just cannot give medical advice, or guess the problems your Mom has, I am sorry, and you certainly did nothing wrong, and do not need to take your post down, it was another that unfortunately did actually say a 'wrong thing.'
    I hope you are OK too. We may be able to help, just not with medical advice, but there are other things that others like myself find helpful in dealing with daily pain, when medication does not help, or only helps 'just' a little. :)
  • Lisatho11987777
    Lisatho11987777 Scope Member Posts: 5,911 Disability Gamechanger
    @chiarieds it must be a worry  being so young worrying about your mum 
  • amira768
    amira768 Community member Posts: 26 Connected
    @amira768 don't worry  just don't follow the medication advice as @chiarieds said we are friendly people  do you look after your mum  it must be difficult to see your mum suffering  we wouldn't know whst is wrong with your mum but she needs medical help  if she is in so much pain 

    Is there just you and your mum  do you have any brothers or sisters  is your dad with you aswel 

    Are you ok  @chiarieds maybe be able to help a bit more don't worry 
    Its just me, my mom and little brother. He is a gaming addict and is the reason for her stress. And yeah my mum really needs medical help, doctors are just so useless..
  • amira768
    amira768 Community member Posts: 26 Connected
    @chiarieds it must be a worry  being so young worrying about your mum 
    Yeah, it really sucks. But what can I do.
  • amira768
    amira768 Community member Posts: 26 Connected
    chiarieds said:
    Hi again @amira768 - as @leeCal said we cannot give medical advice which kamir unfortunately gave, and may not help your Mom as she does not know your Mom's medical history like her doctors will do. You did not do a thing wrong, honestly. You looking for help is certainly not wrong, but even if someone feels they know the symptoms your Mom has, we cannot say, as we cannot know for sure. I hope you understand.
    You certainly can ask for help, but we just cannot give medical advice, or guess the problems your Mom has, I am sorry, and you certainly did nothing wrong, and do not need to take your post down, it was another that unfortunately did actually say a 'wrong thing.'
    I hope you are OK too. We may be able to help, just not with medical advice, but there are other things that others like myself find helpful in dealing with daily pain, when medication does not help, or only helps 'just' a little. :)
    Thank you for your lovely comment! Im doing fine I guess. I just have really bad days sometimes just like today, where my mom is feeling terrible and that takes a toll on me as well. Overall im doing alright. Im just existing. Thanks for the comment.

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