Friends?

Hi Elliot

Fairly recently have had 4 strokes and epilepsy - thought processes, 📝 ry and verbalisation are completely different, many other changes too.

Folk I thought were my friends no longer bothered, I used to really work trying to maintain the friendships and gave up trying when getting nothing back. I still have very very long term friends who continue our friendships.

I now go to sports centre, knitting/sewing groups, brain injury group, lunch groups, chest heart and stroke survivors, choir, community gardening group any group to get me out in community mixing with people.

Over time you eventually will make friends as long as you don't rush to be over friendly with everyone. Take it slowly and easy, you'll discover you then have lots of people around and you enjoy their company.

There are many people out there lonely and frightened to make the step of getting out, being interested in other people - the world does not revolve around you, share being nice and lots of smiles even though it can be hard. That one smile you make, that one word of kindness and interest can change someone's world.

Go out and make a difference to the world - and yours. xx

Elliot I feel as though I am in a similar position but a little more difficult.

I left to join the army at 17, met my then wife and then left the army. Everyone I knew from my school days had gone and I very quickly discovered the ones that were left were not so much as friends, more users, take what they wanted never to be seen again.

After nearly thirty years of marriage my wife decided she no longer loved me although we still lived in the same house, her upstairs, me down.

That Was twelve years ago, now my wife, still married by law if nothing else, has been diagnosed with Vascular dementia a truly horrible disease that evolves very quickly. I have a carer come for thirty minutes of a morning and again of an evening with two very young ladies who sit with her for two hours twice a week.

I myself have health issues, I can walk but not far or very fast but with what is going on in my life i cannot get out much. I have thought about dating sites, which strikes me with fear being quite shy when it comes to the fairer sex, but the reviews every single one of these sites gets makes you realise they are all just money making gimmicks, so what can you do?

I have discovered that my old regiment has yearly reunions at Bkackpool so I have gone out of my comfort zone and booked for next April whilst organising cover to take care of my wife.

Kev1n

Have you tried forces/veterans breakfast club, usually about once a month, meet folk with similar experiences, they can often point you in direction of advice/help for exforces - and there can be a lot of help if advised correctly.

Needing help contact SSAFA for emotional as well as practical and financial support.

Ex forces myself and also volunteered with SSAFA.