Overwhelmed daily alone

@Catherine21 yes the intensity of my grief has been more than any human I losr because of their unconditional love and the look they give you it so broke my heart that night it was terrible. Yer have to think that if yer do get another it won't replace yer own it's just continuing the rescue process. I am looking at a rescue but feel so guilty as I still miss Syd that's why know what you say.. In 2 minds I've been teary uploading Syd vids to keep them yet don't want to see.

Yes i agree in ways many people go about it in different ways on the one hand i'd feel i was treating having Syd as just another dog & having another would be showing that he wasn't loved but then strangely as it seems what would Syd think, he'd probably want us to rescue another Jack Russell like we rescued him, it was only 3 weeks after my previous dog died before getting Syd as he needed to be rescuing. Some see it as a constant job rescuing dogs that have had it bad sat in cold kennels.

My parents although upset & we all share the same grief my but anxiety/dep makes it seem worse for me my mood has been very low since especially in the mornings the guilt & anger. We all now & knew they don't last forever but it all happened so fast & painful to see, i can still hear him occasionally. Thankyou Catherine

Yes totally understand and make sense, void is massive.. his presence around the house, not seeing buried treats or sausages, all the day is so different & the things used to do with Syd especially for my parents as their life was organised around Syd he was their best mate too, there's a massive hole lost for them as they are elderly & a massive part of their mental health, taking him out letting out for a wee etc, when that goes it can all go downhill for them.. Yes when yer have no intention of having another or giving it time before something happens like with Syd after Tommy died, just come out of the blue sometimes.. Syd will never be replaced if we have another but for my family they need another or they'll die themselves

Yes miss finding food and memories of him burying stuff with his nose then when I find it he comes running, think he did on purpose like a game we played. Any other we may get will never replace but the feeling in the house with everything is terrible especially tonight it's been terrible the emptiness, we've all been reminiscing missing the empty space. Like you say after purds you didn't plan on it they just come into life then a new chapter starts. So missing him now.

@Catherine21 yes the emptiness is the one & missing him, thought i just heard him run upstairs stuff like that happens everyday yes same here had around dogs in my life since you & all different which makes yer have to grieve Syd before another comes along and putting yerself through it all again but once had them in house yer can't not.. mornings are terrible when wake & think it ain't happened but don't force anything day to day, worried about elderlies as Syd got them out i fear worst for them now..

@tomwalker i'm so sorry to hear about your situation i try to send strength to you in these times.. i get the despair thing as i have with my elderly family too looking after and seeing them decline it takes a massive toll on the depression & anxiety, then Syd it's often too much all at once he was my best friend, unconditional love.. I run & read, use pc but when overwhelmed with thoughts & memories yer don't feel social & yet feel angry in ways that they seem ok, as is grief..

Hi Catherine it's **** my dr gave me some tranquilizers so i feel sedated.. It's crappy i'm teary & i miss him so much.

Thankyou that means a lot when you think you've cried all yer tears & then more come along especially in mornings when wake maybe have had dreams & so spaced out and then yer remember. It breaks my heart to wonder what they were thinking at the time, when he was ill & just standing looking at me as if to say 'why am i feeling this way daddy' i'll never forget that it was horrible. Yes the love we share with them reflects in the grief we suffer, it comes in waves. Thanks for your sendings, just having a weep at that thought of him looking at me not feeling well my poor little boy.😪