Hi, my name is KayElaineSecchi! — Scope | Disability forum
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Hi, my name is KayElaineSecchi!

Tortishell
Tortishell Community member Posts: 2 Listener
Hi Everyone, I'm hoping that I can make friends on here, I am disabled in the sense that I cannot walk due to me having osteoarthritis  and osteopenia,  the worse being my hip at the moment its bone on bone and they cant operated be the osteopenia has made my bones not stronger enough to support a new hip, so I'm waiting to find out if I can have an ultrasound guided injection  into my hip to hopefully ease the pain I'm in. I live with my partner  and he does help with things I cant do, but after a time you no longer become a partner but a patient, and that's where I am at the moment. He doesnt seem to want to converse with me apart from" morning, do you want breakfast, what shall we have for dinner,  maybe "I'm having a shower" " have I seen the cat" " bye" as he goes out, I'm feeling very lonely.  I thought that maybe he was lonely and he doesnt make friends easily so I (after asking him) basically advertise if there was anyone out there in the same situation that would like to make friends with my partner so he could get out and enjoy a walk here and there to break the monotony of my sole company anyway , he has met a nice man who's wife is bedridden  and he takes his dogs out every morning  so my partner goes with him about 3/4 times a week, but my partner still doesnt talk with me, unless there is an argument or he wants to get his point across. So I now feel it's time for me to get a friend that I can converse with , only problem is I cant get out. I also have ARMD. COPD. AND HEART FAILURE, Well that's me in a nutshell.

Comments

  • Alex_Scope
    Alex_Scope Posts: 7,562 Scope online community team
    Hello @KayElaineSecchi and welcome to the online community, thanks for introducing yourself. You've come to the right place if you're feeling lonely, we're a friendly group, and many of us live with ongoing disabilities and health conditions. 

    Here's a few of the best places to get started on the forum:

    • Recent discussions is where you'll find all the latest conversations our members are having
    • The categories page shows all the different topics for discussion
    • The virtual coffee lounge is a place to chat, get to know other members, and play games too
    In the meantime, have you spoken with your partner about how you're feeling lonely? 

    You might find it helpful to have a look at the Red Cross support line, you can call their free confidential support line on 0808 196 3651 for advice on loneliness support.

    If we can help with anything, please don't hesitate to ask :) 
    Online Community Coordinator
    Scope

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  • Tortishell
    Tortishell Community member Posts: 2 Listener
    edited June 29
    Hi Alex,  yes I've spoken to him regarding me being lonely and why doesnt he speak to me anymore, he just says he wants to have adult conversations not with a child, I'm 74 the last time I looked I wasnt a child I'm afraid he cant see himself doing any wrong, I've said if he's had enough why dont we sell the property and go our own ways. He blaitenly refuses saying theres not enough money in it for him or me to move on so I'm stuck with someone that doesnt care about me at all, but he's frightened that I may take my own life becos I've reached the end of the road for painkillers  the ultra sound injection in my hips is all that's left for pain relief, he's frighten he'll get blamed if I do anything, he said he dont want to go to prison if I do anything so it really is all about him..any advise will gratefully be received thanks regards Kay
  • Alex_Scope
    Alex_Scope Posts: 7,562 Scope online community team
    Thanks for explaining @KayElaineSecchi I'll be sending you an email shortly, nothing to worry about- just regarding your username, as we try to avoid sharing personal information on the community (see our house rules)

    It sounds like a difficult situation for you, have you spoken to family about how you're both feeling?

    Perhaps you could look into self-referring for talking therapies, or maybe look at relationship counselling services? 

    You've mentioned living with chronic pain, are you getting much support from your GP around the mental health impact, as well as physical symptoms?

    Let us know if there's anything else you need, and have a look around whenever you're ready :)
    Online Community Coordinator
    Scope

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