Disability Aid Use Questioned

kipper

Hi

New to the community. I have a big family event coming up and I'm anxious about family members or old friends questioning my use of my disability aids as they haven't seen me with them before and well, because I experience a lot of prejudice generally having a 'hidden disability'. I predict someone saying something along the lines of, 'Do you really need that?' or making some sort of inappropriate joke and it ruining my whole day. I don't want to argue with people but I equally don't want to be explaining myself or trying to be falsely good humoured or jokey in my response. Any advice?

Btw, I recently just told someone (I consider a close friend) in my hometown on the phone about a disability aid I'd be bringing on the trip and her immediate response was, 'Do you really need that though? Like really need it, not just kind of need it,' so this has confirmed that I'm not just worrying over something which is unlikely to happen.

Thanks for any advice in advance.

anisty

Unfortunately, none of us has any control over what others say or think.

The best you can do is to think about how you are going to respond if these comments come.

If you're quick witted, you might choose a polite but firm jokey put down response.

You could ignore in a very pointed fashion: "I'll pretend I didn't hear that. How are you?"

Or look or walk away. Shut it down.

You could do a "I beg your pardon? What makes you think that?" and encourage them into an apologetic explanation.

Or a deep sigh and "Oh, Gawd! Not again!" (as in how many more times)

I can think of many, many more responses! Why not come up with a few and challenge yourself as to how many you can get in to the day?! You will be looking forward to their questions then?

kipper

Thank you. I wish I cared less about what might be said.

Mary_Scope

Hi @kipper and a warm welcome to the community!

I see Anisty has given some good come backs!

I have a "hidden" disability as well but in the past I have had to use aids when the pain is a lot but I still want to be independent and get around in my day to day.

I've had very similar comments over the years(especially when I was younger) and whenever I received an unhelpful, ablest comment I always think well that says an awful lot more about you than it says about me because I am literally just here living my life!