We'd like to move my daughter out of the family home. — Scope | Disability forum
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We'd like to move my daughter out of the family home.


  • JennyF
    JennyF Member Posts: 14 Connected
    Hello Debbie
    I have a number of questions, which I'm posting because I think the answers will be of interest to others.
    My daughter, call her C, is 27, she has a brain injury which has left her nearly blind, with some hearing difficulties and learning difficulties. She lives with us, and we are all desperate to move her out of the family home. This is also advised by our doctor and her social worker. She is on the local authority housing waiting list.

    First question: C has a permanent award of ESA (support group) and is therefore entitled to claim housing benefit. We are in the fortunate position of being able to give her a bit towards bills, and can act as guarantors, so if we could find something suitable, she could rent privately. But in our area, most landlords refuse to accept any one claiming housing benefit. Given that ESA is at least as secure as most earned income, that they would not refuse someone with the same income if it were earned, and that we are guarantors, this appears to me to be discrimination. What do you think?
  • JenniferU
    JenniferU Member Posts: 108 Courageous
    Hi @JennyF @vfrcrazy and @Parent1001 - unfortunately Debbie is not at work at the moment and won't be able to respond to your queries in the short term.

    You might like to post your queries in other threads to get advice from other community members? Alternatively you can email our helpline for advice: [email protected]
  • Debbie_Alumni
    Debbie_Alumni Member Posts: 944 Pioneering
    Hello JennyF

    I’m so sorry for the long delay in replying to your question.
    The issue of landlords not accepting tenants in receipt of benefits is a big issue. It was an issue back when I was working in housing advice. It is even worse now!

    Vast proportions of landlords are buy-to-let landlords and with these types of mortgages come restrictions on who the landlord can rent to. You will find it is more than likely the lender of the mortgage who has imposed the rule not to accept tenants on benefits than the landlord themselves; however there are other landlords who are not so restricted but who still decide not to take the risk and rent to people on benefits.

    I agree with you that your daughter is in a strong position. She has a permanent award of ESA and is in the Support Group and she has guarantors. Unfortunately this is not always enough to convince a potential landlord to allow tenants in receipt of benefits. Quite rightly, landlords are nervous at all of the changes and insecurity around benefits and how this impacts on a tenant's ability to sustain their rent.

    There have been significant changes to benefits and housing legislation at a time when market prices are through the roof particularly in the rental market. Added to the lack of housing being built, it really isn’t good times at the moment. We could end up heading back to the days of slum landlords. Some might argue that we’re already there; particularly those already on benefits and the only properties they can afford are in bad condition.

    I hope that by now you have managed to find some suitable housing for your daughter; however you may have no choice but to wait for an offer from the local authority.

    Good luck and Best wishes
  • SueJ
    SueJ Member Posts: 1 Listener
    Hello Jenny,
    Perhaps by now, there has been some resolution to benefit both your daughter and other family members.
    But if not, why are you desperate to move your brain injured, near blind, brain injured adult daughter with learning and hearing difficulties, out of the family home? Is it because you are finding her increasingly difficult to care for, and/or because it is unsafe for you to leave her on her own, and/or perhaps because she has a challenging personality and/or perhaps she herself longs to leave?
    Yes, having the daily responsibility for even the most loveable of children endlessly into their adulthood and a parent's old age, can lead to exhaustion, ill health and desperation for the carer(s). But if you, and presumably some auxilliary support (?) can't cope with caring for her, what makes you think that she can or ought to live alone?
    in the absence of all the facts, I would hazard that  'living independently' per se, won't be the final best solution..
    After an assessment and some input from a social worker, might I suggest you (and other family members?) look for suitable places online then physically and systematically visit them.
    I have long had connections with the world of disabilities through our now adult child (40 next birthday) experience as a teacher of adults with special needs and the Gateway Clubs. I only tell you this to give clout to my belief that the first best places to investigate are likely to be the Charitable set-ups. Shared-lives-Carers retire, and profit-motivated Homes pass from one (corporate?) owner to another. I've seen it happen again and again. Our beloved son has no siblings so our over-riding concern has been how he would fare on the death of the last parent. We are now very fortunate in that he has settled into a Camphill community (The Lantern at Ringwood) where persons with special needs -companions- work and live alongside volunteers and support staff -co-workers. Even after three years he is still extraordinarily happy to be there,..under the splendidly managed illusion that he is living close to independently. We on the other hand have the great comfort of knowing that he isn't...  and that Elder-care features in the Community plans.
    Such places offering workshops, sheltered homes and companionship are known as 'intentional communities'. 'L'Arche'(?) also have such communities although I am not up to date with their current practices. And on another tack, for some, of course, the Sue Ryder and Leonard Cheshire Homes are a good choice.
    Good Luck
    Very Best Regards


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