My 8 year old is displaying anxious behaviour.

justthe5ofus

Hello,
My my son is 8 and has always had little quirks. For instance, refused to wear shoes, jackets, trousers. Although he will now, but the shoes have to be 'just so'. Hated having his hair cut, thankfully he is okay now. He is always on the move, runs, jumps, rolls. At school he swings on his chair, fidgets with his hands, always in trouble for talking. He doesn't finish his work on time, and is academically delayed in comparison to his peers. He is very impulsive, and while he's aware of consequences, in the moment, it seems like he doesn't care. I have a psychology degree and have tried every type of parenting approach without success. Every report card from P1 to P3 have stated that he has to concentrate more and that he is easily distracted. He is now in P4 and his new teacher shouts a lot, which results in him being sent to the head teacher. He isn't succeeding, and appears to be just coping to get through the day. His older brother, while still acting age appropriately, is well behaved and learning successfully. 

He has a speech therapist for a speech delay, and I have recently contacted an independent occupational therapist who suspects sensory processing issues, and is in the process of completing a sensory profile on him. She suspects tactile defensiveness to a degree, and hyopsensitivity of the proprioreceptive sense. 

He loves to spray the air freshener and will stand and smell it. I have removed these from the house due to the chemicals and the havoc this will be having on his lungs. He has also recently began cutting his clothes at school. This started with his shoes, then his socks and now his trousers. I have explained the dangers, and he's fully aware. I have also offered him other things to cut. I'm unsure on how to deal with this and I am worried that this will eventually manifest itself into self-harming if I don't get a lid on it. 

Overall though, he laughs, plays, communication is fantastic so I do not suspect ASD. I do however suspect ADHD along with the sensory issues. However, at the moment I am more concerned with the scissor use and would appreciate advise on how to deal with this. 

Thank you. 

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Johnluke1

My son has sensory processing disorder and he hates the seams on socks. Won't wear jeans.
I wonder If your child's socks are annoying him and he doesnt know if its shoes or socks causing the problem and maybe the material of the pants too and that's why he is cutting them up. Even certain jumpers my son won't wear. Ive picked him up from school and a few times he has put his jumper on inside out. So them ones I don't put on him anymore. Tried different material and it's worked.

RebeccaMHadvisor

Hi @justthe5ofus

I completely agree with @DannyMoore that it is great you have contacted someone who can help you identify any diagnosis that your son may or many not have. I think some schools do struggle to deal with children who's behavior doesn't confirm to the 'norm' and follow the line. 

Having an occupational therapist will help you to get any support that he may need but more importantly it will help school understand better what works and doesn't work and give them different tools to help them support him.

Rebecca

jdtayloruk

Hi, it may well be adhd. Have you asked the school if they’ve got a special needs officer? They should be able to help. Also it may be autism have a look at www.nas.org.uk (National Autistic Society) they may well have a local officer who can help. 

One thing I would suggest, speak to your doctors, there may be an assement unit near you who can diagnose these things. I think there may also  be some medication which could help calm him down in class, so your doctor could be a very good step along with the school.

I hope this helps.