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Negativity!!!

Hi. I’ve got 2 boys with Sen. My youngest is non-verbal & severely autistic. I had a big fall out with my hubby over Christmas, due to his families constant negativity about our son and why he won’t talk? My sister-in-law really upset me, and basically slagged off my whole family & said the autism came from our side of the family. She’s never apologised despite knowing I am upset. It spoilt my Xmas, partially because my hubby sat there and let her do it without stopping her and defending me!!!! I have told him I don’t want anything more to do with her, and she is not welcome in our house!
She is due to come down twice in the next few weeks and I am dreading it.
I should also point out by hubby and sister-in-law also lost my son last year when he was in their care! The police found him thank goodness, but my son doesn’t like her, and I suspect was trying to get/run away from her! He’s clearly a good judge of character!
Any advice on how to handle it, would be greatly appreciated, as I am stressed out about it!
She is due to come down twice in the next few weeks and I am dreading it.
I should also point out by hubby and sister-in-law also lost my son last year when he was in their care! The police found him thank goodness, but my son doesn’t like her, and I suspect was trying to get/run away from her! He’s clearly a good judge of character!
Any advice on how to handle it, would be greatly appreciated, as I am stressed out about it!
Replies
I'm by no means qualified to assist here, but you might want to consider contacting Parentline's confidential support line, as they could be better placed to offer some support and guidance in this case. Wishing you all the best!
if it was me i'd just cut contact because it's not my job to educate anyone, but if you feel you have to bother with her i'd remain polite and emotionally detached from her so long as she is also being polite. slightest sign on aggro from her i would continue to remain emotionally detached and reply to her that you don't really care for her opinion and don't want to discuss this again. if she continues to talk just walk away, show her unless she respects your family then you're not going to entertain her.
i did this with an ex, he'd been hassling me for years and trying to control my life (because i had his kids), i did tell him a few truths of my own that probably hurt his ego too but i was sick of him. but being clear, calm, and assertive can work.
if you think there's any chance of her being violent to you for being rude then i don't recommend doing this.
Erhhh,...I don’t think so sweetheart! I told him that he could go and see her at his mothers house and that I didn’t want to see her.
Hubbybis scared of her I think, so Christ knows how his ‘little chat’ went today.
Dreading the weekend. :-(