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Hi, my name is SallyMartin!

SallyMartinSallyMartin Member Posts: 14 Courageous
New to this site! But am here, as I have had multiple sclerosis for nearly 5 years now. I had a one off bad hit, 4 months in hospital,  then a wheelchair,  then a stick, but no more! In fact i recently ran, walked and wheelchaired the Bristol half marathon for charity M. s research. And now am job hunting again,  I took voluntary redundancy from a good globally travelling job 6 weeks before diagnosis of m.s, rather than move my then family to Puerto Rico.  I have 2 young boys  (8&10) and their father has left (he didn't really get what m.s. did to me!), but despite my brain condition, I can still speak 4 European languages fluently ! But can't find a job that works within school hours!  Heyho onwards and upwards as said! 

Replies

  • Pippa_AlumniPippa_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,851 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @SallyMartin, and welcome to the community! Great to have you here, and congratulations on the half marathon!

    If you're struggling with job hunting, you may be interested in Scope's Support to Work scheme, and you can also ask our employment advisors your questions. Do let us know if we can be of any assistance!
  • JennysDadJennysDad Member Posts: 2,308 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello Sally, @SallyMartin and a warm welcome to you. It is good to 'meet' you.
    Warmest best wishes to you,
    Richard
  • SallyMartinSallyMartin Member Posts: 14 Courageous
    So how many other m.s.ers are here?! There are quite a few!
  • JennysDadJennysDad Member Posts: 2,308 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi Sally, @SallyMartin and it is good to hear back from you.

    I found a few MS related posts by using the Search box at the top of the page, though some of them do not seem to be current. I'm going to tag a few members here who have referred to the condition: @bam , @Rhona , @tinakath01 in the hope that it will draw their attention to your post.

    I don't know how many people we have here who have the condition - the Scope community covers pretty much the whole range of disabilities, so posts can turn up in pretty much any category. It's worth remembering that others here who do not have MS will have conditions or suffer consequences to conditions that are not at all dissimilar to it and will probably be eager to chat. Whilst you're waiting to hear back from others you might look through the categories here https://community.scope.org.uk/categories and see what you find.

    Though I do not have MS myself it would be an honour to me to be considered a friend, and if there is any help towards which I can direct you I hope you won't hesitate to mention it. If you use the tag @JennysDad in a post I will automatically be notified, so there is no need for us to lost touch.

    And you might like to have a look at the MS Society UK site, https://www.mssociety.org.uk/

    I hope some of this proves to be of use to you. Don't hesitate to get back to me about anything.

    Warmest best wishes to you,
    Richard
  • RhonaRhona Member Posts: 13 Courageous
    Thank you @JennysDad for mentioning me in your post to @SallyMartin. I had forgotten this site (oh the wonders of MS memory games!) 
    I was diagnosed with MS in 1994 six months before I was due to get married. I told my fiance that he didn't have to marry me and I am eternally grateful that he told me not to be so stupid and we've just celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary.
    I'm not brilliant at starting posts on here but I do try to respond if I'm mentioned.
    Best wishes to you both,
    Rhona.
  • JennysDadJennysDad Member Posts: 2,308 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Rhona and thank you for joining us. I appreciate it very much.
    Warmest best wishes,
    Richard
  • SallyMartinSallyMartin Member Posts: 14 Courageous
    Thank you both for responding.  The think I hate most is people thinking am drunk all the time! Including the Ex!
  • RhonaRhona Member Posts: 13 Courageous
    When I was still walking with a stick or two I got fed up with people thinking I was drunk and I never found a way around that apart from, if I can, talking to show my sobriety. 
    Now I am in a wheelchair I don't get that reaction any more. It's now people talking down to me. However I don't let them get away with that for long but engage them in conversation. I never upset anyone and normally we end up laughing and hopefully they go away with a change to their blinkered views.
  • SallyMartinSallyMartin Member Posts: 14 Courageous
    Yes, even when I was walking children to school with my stick and dropped the stick, people often said 'oh she's just drunk', even at 8.30am!!! Thankfully now I don't walk with the stick but i guess I still wobble about! 
  • JennysDadJennysDad Member Posts: 2,308 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi Rhona @Rhona and Sally @SallyMartin
    There seems to be a peculiar mind-set about that has people routinely judging others, seeking to blame them for any problem they seem to have. As in, he/she must be drunk.
    I first met elements of it when my daughter was alive, some 30 years ago, but it seems to me to have got stronger over time. Very, very sad.
    Lovely to see you both here,
    Richard
  • SallyMartinSallyMartin Member Posts: 14 Courageous
    But seriously it was when I walked children up to school at 8.30am, am not that stupid to be drunk then!
  • JennysDadJennysDad Member Posts: 2,308 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi Sally,
    and yes, I understood that. The problem is that people have this crazy capacity for self deception. I've said it many times elsewhere - the human mind is an environment, it is the environment in which, in a very important sense, we live. Just like any other environment we live in, the tendency and temptation is to make it as comfortable as possible. The lumpy old bed, the sagging old armchair? Throw them out. The idea that people are suffering and continue to suffer because we do not make enough effort to help? Throw it out. Find a means to blame them, because blaming one's self is uncomfortable.
    It underscores human life to a tragic extent. (In my view, of course)

  • RhonaRhona Member Posts: 13 Courageous
    And people will always go for the easiest answer for something they don't understand. They understand the concept of drunkenness and don't think any further than that.
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