Somebody to attend PIP assessment with me

Bevers1959

Thank you 

Yadnad

Bevers1959 said:

Obviously that  person is not like me ,he said he has depression  and that he remains strong for his wife so much so she waits in the waiting room ,am sorry but the fact that he could actually go in with no hesitation and that he keeps control baffles me ,the dread i have is to actually get to the place  and i cant stop breaking down anywhere and everyday  wish i could control my anxiety and depression 

Everybody is different.
The last thing that I want to do is for me to try to talk about my issues with the assessor without the worry of how my wife would feel if she realised the true extent of my problems.
I have no choice in the matter - maybe I am wrong but I have protected my wife over the years on many things relating to my health.
She is not a well woman either.
It's not a case of walking into the assessment alone with no hesitation and having full control of my issues. The choice is not there - I have no choice.
As for full control, grief, without that control the first thing that would happen if I became agitated was to probably demolish the damn room. Anybody that then came in would have to be extremely careful in how they approached me. I know what I can be like - probably their worst nightmare.
Hence the reason why I have had to be sectioned in the past - not just for my benefit but mainly for the benefit of everybody around me.
Without that control how would my wife react if I was pushed that far?

Over the years with counselling etc I have had to learn how to control myself.

I would add that before the incident I was the most placid and patient guy that you could meet.
With the brain injury on top of the PTSD my personality changed overnight

I lead a normal life to the outsider which is only possible because of the drugs I am on and the hours and years I have spent within the mental health system trying to take back control of my life.