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Mental Health caused by physical health problems

Tigger30 Community member Posts: 2 Listener
I am suffering from severe depression which initially was bought on by my physical health condition but very recently I loss my dear Mum to cancer & so also grieving I am not coping very well.


  • Antonia_Alumni
    Antonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,780 Pioneering
    edited March 2019
    Hi @Tigger30 welcome to the community. 

    Thank you for sharing this with us. I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum. Are you getting any emotional support at the moment? 

    It might be helpful to get in touch with your GP or with Cruse Bereavement Care,
    their helpline is 0808 808 1677 and they open from Monday-Friday 9.30-5pm, with extended hours on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evenings, when they open until 8pm.

    How are you doing today?
  • Sam_Alumni
    Sam_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,671 Disability Gamechanger
    Welcome to the community @Tigger30
    I am sorry to hear about your mum passing away, it must be such a tough time for you. Grief affect people in so many different ways, I lost my nannan last June and I still think of her every single day, I still can't drive past her house as it makes me cry.

    As Antonia said, you could speak to you GP about how you are feeling or Cruse are a wonderful support to so many.

    Im glad you have reached out to us here on the community though, it is a safe and supportive space and I hope we can help.
    Senior online community officer
  • deemariedel
    deemariedel Community member Posts: 4 Listener
    edited March 2019
    Hello @Tigger30

    Words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. My partner has severe anxiety and just lost her mother to cancer as well. It is not easy by any means. It's been a couple of months, and my partner is still not ready to face the real world. So please don't feel like you're supposed to be handling this better regardless how much time has passed. As Sam said above, grief affects people differently. You just lost the most important person in your life, its okay to be upset and be emotional. It's okay to cry and let it out, talk about her constantly, reminisce and think about the beautiful memories. This may help a bit. Other ways that my partner has been getting through it which may help you is by writing to her mother, reading grief books (when bad things happen to good people by Harold Kushner and healing grief by Barbara Ward), and spending time/talking with family constantly. She is still considering going to a grief group which I have been told really helps and provides the support you may need through this hard time. You’re stronger than you think. Hoping these poems below as well as the love surrounding you gives you some comfort. Thinking of you
    Remember Me

    "To the living, I am gone, 
    To the sorrowful, I will never return, 
    To the angry, I was cheated, 
    But to the happy, I am at peace, 
    And to the faithful, I have never left.

    I cannot speak, but I can listen. 
    I cannot be seen, but I can be heard. 
    So as you stand upon a shore gazing at a beautiful sea, 
    As you look upon a flower and admire its simplicity, 
    Remember me.

    Remember me in your heart: 
    Your thoughts, and your memories, 
    Of the times we loved, 
    The times we cried, 
    The times we fought, 
    The times we laughed. 
    For if you always think of me, I will never have gone."

    Death is nothing  at all
    “Death is nothing at all. It does not count. I have only slipped away into the next room. Nothing has happened. 
    Everything remains exactly as it was. I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. 
    Call me by the old familiar name. Speak of me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference into your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. 
    Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it. 
    Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was. There is absolute and unbroken continuity. What is this death but a negligible accident? 
    Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just round the corner. 
    All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!” 
    ― Henry Scott Holland
  • Antonia_Alumni
    Antonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,780 Pioneering
    edited March 2019
    Thank you for sharing this with us @deemariedel I am sorry to hear about your partner's mum. Please keep us updated on how our partner is doing, I think the grief group will be helpful.
  • Tigger30
    Tigger30 Community member Posts: 2 Listener
    Dee Mariedel Thankyou so much for responding to my message and sending me those lovely poems I write some of my own poetry as I do find it relaxing.I know everyone grieves differently and good to know I am not the only one in the grieving process.
  • SaraC_Scope
    SaraC_Scope CP Network, Scope Posts: 45 Courageous
    Hi @Tigger30

    I volunteer with Cruse Bereavement and the support they can provide to those going through the bereavement process is wonderful.

    Give yourself as much time as you need.  This support network is here for you as well, so you're never alone.

    Take Care
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