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Highly Sensitive Person

iza
iza Community Co-Production Group Posts: 529 Pioneering
Hi All, 

I am reading at the moment book written by Federica Bosco in my native language. I cannot find original tittle translation to English but translate here for you from my native language, it would sounds like : "They told me, I am too highly sensitive." 

Would any of you also consider yourself to highly sensitive person? If yes, please say why? 

Thanks 
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Comments

  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,557 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @iza, thank you for sharing this with us. Are you enjoying the book?
    Scope

  • Seanchai
    Seanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    Its lovely to get a good book that you can get into iza...I spent half my week in the library at one time but after I got my first Kindle . i met the lady out the library a few months later and she said she was glad to see i was ok as she had not seen me in the library for months ....she asked if I had stopped reading books. ( I always loved non- fiction ...I just cannot get into fiction ) I thanked her for her concern and told her i was not reading so many books these days ...we said goodbye ...i then had a wee laugh to myself , i did in fact read more than i ever did . 
    Enjoy your book iza , i think most of people with a disability are more sensitive to people around them , we learn to read people,s looks and the odd misplaced word. 
  • Franstrahan
    Franstrahan Member Posts: 898 Pioneering
    By highly sensitive do you mean easily offended? I think I'm that.
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Member Posts: 6,389 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @iza   Thank you for your post.

    I am aware I am especially my disability when ever out in social areas.

    The pointing the looks the way is that gentleman different .  Making references to my disability.

    No problems with children or teenagers or young adults.

    Members of our community.

    Usually a specific type of person.

    Annoying, irritating and simply not pleasant.

    I am also have sensitivity towards any one making any coarse, offensive rude remarks to any one on this forum, others may think not to use language not suitable for a forum and website.

    I am a white Knight defend any one who is insulted, hurt, harmed if the person is getting upset because of insensitive remarks, comments.

    As that is one of my roles as Community Champion.

    Hope that gives you reassurance.

    Always here to be supportive.

    Please take care.

    @thespiceman




    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • androgynous
    androgynous Member Posts: 70 Courageous
    edited January 2020
    I used to be sensitive but I've learnt over time not to overthink things.

    I used to get upset because people thought I was rude when I didn't answer them, when in fact i didn't hear them as i've lost my hearing due to another of my conditions, they suspect.

    Somebody once told me it's their problem not yours and that's how i look at things now. They don't know my disabilities because they don't know me personally. I've been targeted because i'm disabled. It is as it is. What's the point in geting upset?

    Same as an internet forum, no one can see your disabilities through a computer screen?

    I do though get the feeling i'm being followed around a forum, although i've no idea why?

    If you were very sensitive you could get upset?

    But then, with health conditions, that can also affect your state of sensitivity?

    The state of your health can greatly affect your wellbeing, the state of your mind and therefore, enhanced sensitivity?
  • iza
    iza Community Co-Production Group Posts: 529 Pioneering
    Hi All, 

    Thank you for all your responses. 
    @Chloe_Scope , yes I do enjoy the book. I just started few days ago but I make notes at the same time I am reading it so I can come book to the most interesting thought lather again. 
    @Seanchai, I indeed love reading books and last year I read quite good titles in my native language. I always like to read books which increase my knowledge and enrich me intellectually. 
    @thespiceman thank you for sharing your gentleman attitude skills, I had notice your earlier post about staying fair and respecting each others here within the online community.
    @androgynous, yes you are right that sensitive people overthink constantly overthink things constantly. I now realised that very often I did this as well. 

    Have a great day all. 

  • OverlyAnxious
    OverlyAnxious Member Posts: 1,736 Disability Gamechanger
    Interesting question...  Physically I'm highly sensitive...light, temperature, noise, taste, touch etc.  

    But I don't really get offended by anything.  You'd really have to try hard to offend me!! :D  I am acutely aware of how easily offended some people are though, spent a lot of my earlier life on eggshells lol! 
  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,557 Disability Gamechanger
    Great to hear this @iza! :)
    Scope

  • Franstrahan
    Franstrahan Member Posts: 898 Pioneering
    @OverlyAnxious
    As a relatively recently diagnosed autistic person I'm now hearing and reading that autistic people dont have emotions. I certainly lack some of them but not all. Somebody said about me that I can be very blunt, but they also said you can be as rude as you like to her and it has no effect. So that wouldn't account for me getting 'angry' (emotion) and losing my temper and shouting at this person? 
    But yes I am easily offended and far to quick to fly off the handle.
    Highly sensitive!
  • Seanchai
    Seanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    Good stuff Iza .... I love reading , especially now I have no hearing ?. I like to learn something new every day ....and I do a lot of that on this very site ?
  • Seanchai
    Seanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    I tend to get anxious and depressed ....I have been like that since last summer when i first got word that i would be assessed for PIP... I know myself that i could never get up every morning and get out of bed , some days i cannot breath right until i use my nebuliser( COPD ) ... I have to sleep sitting upright in bed and some nights i slip down the bed and wake up choking ...pretty frightening , I also cannot hear now apart from terrible tinnitus in my right ear ( like a jet engine just before take off ) I could put up with being deaf but the constant noise is driving me crazy ...from the second I awake until my drug induced sleep each night . ( prescription drugs I must add) . My menieres has not been to bad since I was awarded PIP ... and now my wife ( who should have been pension age five years ago at 60) has now turned pension age at 65 and 7 months...we await to see when her first senior pensioners payment comes through . My wife went in to see the dhss a few months ago and they said just to leave it until she actually was pension age before she claimed . So she left it ...but the following week she got a letter from DWP telling her to claim just now and don,t leave it any later than the following week to claim your pension . She went to the carers centre ( my wife is my carer) , they sent her to CAB and they applied for her and then told her to go to the local dhss ...who once again told yer to leave it until after Christmas ( she goes on the pension on 6th January past) I don,t get my pension until next January when I,m 66 ...they told us that she cannot claim pension credits as we both need to be pension age to do that?more new rules that very few of us know about .Now as my wife loses her carers allowance and income support from 6th January we were advised to claim universal credit ...she was " invited" into the dhss offices to apply for universal credit . They told my wife that I would yave to attend as it's a joint claim ....my wife explained that I was house bound as I was struggling for breath some days , they said they would send someone in from DWP to check I am who I said I am....if it's not me then they have been paying me DLA for over ten years now , the fella was nice enough but he wanted to see my passport and my driving licence to verify who I am. That's the rules for UC .....but what we did find with UC is that the various offices my wife spoke to and the various phone calls to UC ....we know for sure that the staff are not been trained for the upcoming rolling out of UC . We have applied for UC as my wife loses carers and income support so we would have to pay full rent and council tax if we are not awarded UC . The fella that visited me told my wife that she would need to register for a " journal" as we need to check in at least twice a week with our " work coach" there are rules and regulations that we must keep a list of what we are doing or we will/ can be sanctioned if we don,t . I asked about why we would need a journal as I am on enhanced PIP for the next ten years ( i know I will not survive hat long so that's one less thing to worry about and my wife is retiring from the  6th January ...what is the reason for us having to talk to our work coach twice or three times a week ?.....but rules are rules ...one office tells us to do one thing and another office tells us to do another thing . I,m afraid whoever dreamed up this UC is feelingmtheir way around in the dark ...and nobody can give us a straight answer to any questions ...this last six months has added years to us two ....we were ready for giving up ....it feels as though that the very thing the government want us to do .....and that's what keeps us going . ...but I must take a few lines to thank the support staff on this amazing site , especially polly123456....God knows where we would be without her guidance and encouragement not to give up .When your unwell the last thing you need is stress and hassle and wondering how , or if we can afford to live . I thank all on this site for the encouragement to keep going when it would have been far easier to say " f*** it"  ...but that's what the government want by the looks of things ...
    We should hear by next week if we will get anything from UC ...so they tell us . I,m disabled and my wife has now retired and they want us to keep in touch with a 'work coach '...I can see loads of trouble ahead when UC gets rolled out to all .
    Thanks to all for your help and encouragement over the last six months , it's taken years off our life I,m afraid ...
    May your God go with you .
  • Franstrahan
    Franstrahan Member Posts: 898 Pioneering
    @Seanchai
    Dwp sees and thinks in black and white and doesnt allow for the grey and cream areas that most of us fall into.
    Uc will never work unless of course you fit into their little black and white box, which again few of us do.
    Join with you in praise of this forum and all the community champions and Chloe and Adrian and all.
    This forum keeps me going too.
    God Bless All xx
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Member Posts: 6,389 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Seanchai    Sorry to hear this my friend, please if I can help.

    First I think in your situation with anxiety, depression I know this as do discuss a lot.

    Even contacting the following would help.

    These are the three main mental health charities I have used.

    https://www.richmondfellowship.org.uk.

    https://www.mind.org.uk.

    https://www.rethink.org.

    I would consider looking because of several reasons.

    One is helping this situation with your benefits and UC simply in my opinion not good to hear.

    I do understand have care, compassion my own personal view those of my age and older is it possible and should be.  Separate guidelines, rules.

    Since being involved on this forum and meeting lovely friends like yourself. Feel has to change, at least think that being older does has problems, a lot.

    Are employers going to look at those of our community who are older. This was something I had myself. Panics, anxiety, the relapses fears, my addiction.

    Who is and why would I get a employment position with thirty years old out of date qualifications.

    There is a company called SHAW trust in my area, deals with training members of community for work, and anything to do with employment.

    Even they are making choices saying no to members like myself and others. Sorry to sound negative, as she the pleasant lady added.

    Your too far gone, need a least years or more training. Most of that is expenses, costs they do not have, initial training is six months.

    I had this a similar experience few years a go with JSA , having ten members of staff to sign on with.

    After losing another assessment a serious major problems because continuous changing my status, one assessor fit debates I am, eighteen months later debates, assessor un fit and around we go again, ten years or more.

    Clueless, memory loss and am of an age forgetting to sign on.

    Contacting and getting the DWP appeals and tribunals some good some failures.  Focus on positives.

    As I was with Richmond Fellowship a mental health charity was given hope, salvation, kindness and much reassurance.

    I am a private gent and am  embarrassed to discuss anything like this, thought making a fuss.

    More times than ever my support worker my age and lovely, kind went with me to the Employment services offices.

    Made a lot of consultation, advice and we the three of us. JSA staff member, my support and myself discussed this the many aspects of how they can make my visits more bearable.

    Also to that enquiries to make me claim again benefits for long term, PIP and ESA.

    Especially ESA, spoke to DWP consulted GP.

    Still now three years will have to be reassessed again, as for the same PIP.

    Daft, silly and pointless in any case why just leave those to live a life.

    As we grow older those of the age should be not having anxiety.

    Is anything going to change no it is not, is it.

    All mental health charities have experiences of dealing with members of our community.

    Many of our ages and older, council teams have no funding or do not care, concern.

    Had and have done met those like yourself as neighbours.

    Been supportive in my neighbourhood those serious neglected, ill  and disabled left to their own devices by Council Teams.

    Worse many had no understanding of anything like benefit systems or the need to apply for certain entitled benefits to help them cope.

    Learning difficulties, OAPS, those with long term health issues the homes I lived in had to help.

    So much so had to make a rule please do not ring me before a certain time in the morning.  Had some elderly gents who had learning difficulties ring me around early morning.

    Either because some problem or some had help to make breakfast.

    Private agency turn up late, not a care or concern not bothered.

    He or she paying for this which shocked me, I made a point to evaluate every one who I was helping, offering guidence, advice . If I could.

    Some did have Council help but was cut or told restricted.

    Not pleasant to see elderly gentleman living on sandwiches or soup, in cold weather.

    Bought them all to ARGOS, got them microwaves, kettles, toasters.

    Now here on my own as time moved on, those I helped passed on.

    I do think about how I can help those like yourself.  Community Champion role.

    Please ask me anything you know that tag me in talk to me. Have a lot of organisations, support, wealth of knowledge, expertise.

    I am as you know am and do believe every one deserves recognitions, praise and admiration in the things they have done in life and contributed to society.

    We need to be giving them the love and respect.

    Unfortunately this is not happening outside the forum, I hope here you find solace, peace need answers ask.

    Time not to be a proud gentleman although that is hard acceptance, offer help from some one else. I know this my self. Do know have a Christian heart and do think of those can offer my time.

    I know these might be useful.   Good websites.

    https://www.ageuk.org.uk.

    https://www.salvationarmy.org.uk.

    https://www.redcross.org.uk.

    All the best to you and please take care.

    Your friend

    @thespiceman







    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • Seanchai
    Seanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    Thank you for your very interesting post Spiceman ....very thought provoking . I sometimes feel I am the only one that gets hurdles put up in front of me....but I know that it's not just me . Sometimes I feel like giving up as this life is becoming so hard to get through.
    I used to get assessments and attend judgement panels ...The first ' panel' voted in my favour ....yet the young lady ( I use the term 'lady' loosely ) She told me ( quietly ) that I had maybe won this one but I would hear more from her) ...was it a personal battle I was in ? I certainly felt it that's for sure . ..... and I felt it right through my illnesses . When you get to a certain age the norm becomes a hard battle . UC told us yesterday that we do not need to go into a " journal" and they will deal with us by letter ....great ...or so we thought ...today I got another e- mail from UC telling me I would have to keep my journal up to date or I would not receive UC . 
    every say , it's never ending ???
    Thank you Spiceman for taking the time to write your post , I do appreciate your support....it helps me feel I am not alone with this never ending merry go round of questions and judgement .
    Thank you .
    Seanchai ( 'seanchai'  is gaelige for a man who wandered from village to village telling the villagers the latest news through word and song ....and seanchai is pronounced " shan a key " ??
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Member Posts: 6,389 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 2020
    Hello @Seanchai   Thank you for reply. Pleasure to help you your not alone with anything like this.

    Please consider the information, links.

    Some thing like the Salvation Army has a lot of services to offer including lunch clubs lot of support groups for vulnerable groups of our community.

    The Red Cross the same in these times.

    Please look at any mental health charities offer so much.

    Pleasure to be helping, advising being a friend.

    Please if I can help please get in touch.

    Please take care.

    @thespiceman
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • Seanchai
    Seanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    I will look into the various help sites you advised my friend ....my head is messed up just now with trying to deal with UC , they moved my wife onto universal credit as she has now retired . One person ( in the rent offices ) could not believe that our income support has stopped and my wife,s carers allowance has stopped ....she is still doing what she has done for years now ' caring for me' ..the lady in the rent office had to check with the DWP to verify we had her carers allowance simply down to her turning retiring age ...but she was so surprised to find my wife's carers allowance and our income support has stopped due to her age . We are now in the process of claiming UC and it seems each  DWP office is telling us different things ...God know why we would need a " journal" where my retired wife and I ( on PIP for the next ten years would need to sign a statement saying we are looking for work ...and we have to sign in to or tgree times a week with our " work coach" ...its crazy . 
    Sure I know the UC credit is only finding it's way but whoever dreamt UC up has not got a clue of the various situations in this one thing fits all " journal "
    Thanks again Spiceman,  your help and advice (as always ) is greatly appreciated ?
  • Franstrahan
    Franstrahan Member Posts: 898 Pioneering
    @Seanchai
    Maybe I got it wrong but I thought UC was for people who would be capable of going back to work at some point in the future. Not for retired people. The journals so you can keep in touch with your job coach.
    I dont think the dwp knows what it's doing - possibly?
  • Seanchai
    Seanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    so did I Fran ....but there we go , I feel we are the first ones they have came across in this situation....I,m on enhanced PIP and my wife is retired .(11 days ago.).yet we were expected to fill out journals and keep in touch with our work coach .....there are less than 2 million on Universal credit ....in the next two years they are expecting over 20 million people to be signing into,their work journal coach each day .
    UC is going to cover a good few benefits including income support .
    I see trouble ahead Fran . my wife dealtmwithnthree offices face to face and they all told us different things about applying for UC ....there is going to be one mess when over 20 million is going to be signing on to your work coach every day ....no holidays unless you can get back home within a day for an interview ?The pages and pages we had to fill out for our work coach ....I reckon it's more hassle signing on to UC than it was signing ( with a face to face assesment) on to PIP ...the " journal" which every claimer must have where you need to sign in each day and where your work coach sends you a message in your journal , you must answer within the day ...or you could be 'sanctioned'....you are allowed a holiday as long as you are able to get home if an interview crops up ......if not your 'sanctioned'.  
    it's been very depressing in the last wee while answering hundreds of questioned ...and nobody being able to give us a straight answer 

  • Franstrahan
    Franstrahan Member Posts: 898 Pioneering
    @Seanchai
    I think at the moment because I am covered by a sick note from my docs (which they now call a fit note for some unexplainable reason) I havent felt the full force of UC. I've been on a sick note for just over a year now, which is probably why they are so keen I attend this WCA thing. It sounds horrendous then, if you are not covered by such a thing as a sick note. I do have to talk to my job coach, but only once a month on the phone. Dont think I could deal with the hassle you and your wife are currently going through with the system. Whatever, I, with my limited knowledge of these things, honestly dont think either of you should be on UC, and that seems so glaringly obvious!! They are in a mess now, what's it going to be like when UC is rolled out all over. And look at the misery and stress they are causing people, with late payments etc. and taking back of overpayments as they are doing with me, leaving me at one point with 65 quid a week. The gap between the haves and have nots is widening. We need some politicians with the backbone to stand up for the underdogs.
  • Franstrahan
    Franstrahan Member Posts: 898 Pioneering
    @Seanchai
    Ideally now the government would admit universal credit, their 'one size fits all' benefit, isn't working, and scrap it for a range of benefits more tailored to fit each individuals situation. But that would take more manpower to operate and cost money. So meantime anyone who falls into the clutches of the benefit system can almost certainly expect to get poor treatment at its hands somewhere along the line. The poor, the sick, and the disabled currently dont have a voice to stand up for them in the UK.

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