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mental health being so cruel

ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
in Mental health issues
well here i am another early morning as they all are anything from about 3am onwards but has been many many years since i slept past 7am as i always wake up with something going around in my head. for some reason i never seem to get peace in my mind and am always flapping about something due to my depression and anxiety so do all sufferers feel like this?. i looked forward to retirement for quite a few years but now ive got it cant do nothing because of my conditions and there are not many days i just wish i wasnt here just to get some peace of mind. do most with anxiety and depression flap so much like me or is it just me?. have a good day everyone and hope nice things happen to you all.
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Replies

  • OxonladyOxonlady Member Posts: 251 Pioneering
    Hi ernie2009, sorry to hear about your sleep problems.

    My problem is that, even though I'm constantly physically exhausted, I can't sleep for more than 2-3 hours at a time, day or night. I keep waking up, sometimes I can go back to sleep, other times I can't. The only way I can deal with it is not to get upset about it. I sometimes just pray or check my emails or listen to soft music.
    I find that I don't have to accept thoughts and worries going on around my head. I can soothe myself with gentle reminders of my many blessings and this really helps me. I'm not saying that this will work for everyone, it just does for me. Perhaps we each have to find out own way of coping. At least you know that you are not alone. Look after yourself. 

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  • OxonladyOxonlady Member Posts: 251 Pioneering
    PS Have you spoken to your GP about your sleep problems, depression and anxiety? Are you on medication? Having support from your GP or mental health professional could be a helpful resource for you. 
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Oxonlady said:
    Hi ernie2009, sorry to hear about your sleep problems.

    My problem is that, even though I'm constantly physically exhausted, I can't sleep for more than 2-3 hours at a time, day or night. I keep waking up, sometimes I can go back to sleep, other times I can't. The only way I can deal with it is not to get upset about it. I sometimes just pray or check my emails or listen to soft music.
    I find that I don't have to accept thoughts and worries going on around my head. I can soothe myself with gentle reminders of my many blessings and this really helps me. I'm not saying that this will work for everyone, it just does for me. Perhaps we each have to find out own way of coping. At least you know that you are not alone. Look after yourself. 

    Oxonlady said:
    Hi ernie2009, sorry to hear about your sleep problems.

    My problem is that, even though I'm constantly physically exhausted, I can't sleep for more than 2-3 hours at a time, day or night. I keep waking up, sometimes I can go back to sleep, other times I can't. The only way I can deal with it is not to get upset about it. I sometimes just pray or check my emails or listen to soft music.
    I find that I don't have to accept thoughts and worries going on around my head. I can soothe myself with gentle reminders of my many blessings and this really helps me. I'm not saying that this will work for everyone, it just does for me. Perhaps we each have to find out own way of coping. At least you know that you are not alone. Look after yourself. 

    hi oxonlady, yes this sounds just like me where i go to sleep only to keep waking up. in the daytime if i fall asleep its only like catnapping. problem is with me once i have things going around in my head they get to me so bad i go into meltdown really bad its like the end of the world. most times the only way i can get to sleep is if i plug in my ipod but at least the i get some sort of sleep. peace of mind is what i need and am looking for but think i have more chance of finding winning lottery ticket .have a great day and many thanks for your kind message.
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Oxonlady said:
    PS Have you spoken to your GP about your sleep problems, depression and anxiety? Are you on medication? Having support from your GP or mental health professional could be a helpful resource for you. 
    Oxonlady said:
    PS Have you spoken to your GP about your sleep problems, depression and anxiety? Are you on medication? Having support from your GP or mental health professional could be a helpful resource for you. 
    yes ive been with 2 gp,s plus psychiatrist for few years now and on mirtazapine plus amitriptyline but think because it took so many years before my problems were diagnosed the damage was done. when my depression and anxiety were diagnosed i was told they thought it had been going on for many years.many thanks again for your kind message.
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  • OxonladyOxonlady Member Posts: 251 Pioneering
    Ernie2009, you are welcome. I didn't want you to feel alone, you can discuss your thoughts and feelings here with this friendly community any time. I hope you have a pleasant day. Take care. 

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  • leeCalleeCal Member Posts: 2,754 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @ernie2009 have you thought of trying to do exercises during the day in order to help tire yourself out for bedtime? 

    I often wake wake up at 3/4 am and if I get irritated by it things are worse. So I try to remain calm and try to meditate very gently and mostly I fall back to sleep. Sometimes though I have to take a half dose of clonazepam but I avoid doing so as they are addictive. I also try not to nap during the day.

    best wishes.
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  • Ross_ScopeRoss_Scope Community Team Posts: 2,139 Pioneering
    Hi @ernie2009

    I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with your mental health, this community is here to support you and you are absolutely valued on here. Mental health can be cruel, and so can sleep problems, but you can absolutely beat them. 

    I'm glad that you have certain things like your iPod that help you eventually get to sleep. You might find this resource from the NHS useful, it has some good tips about combating sleeping problems that are simple to implement and could have a positive impact.

    I'm sorry that it took so long for your depression and anxiety to be diagnosed, but if your GPs and psychiatrist haven't been able to help you enough have you considered getting another referral? A new psychiatrist might have a different approach that works better for you. 

    Alternatively, there are services from the third sector like charitable organisations that offer fantastic support and could help you on the way to improving your mental health, see this page from Mind for further details. 

    Also, Samaritans offer a 24/7 phone line that will provide support if ever you want to just talk to someone.

    And of course this community is here as well, we always welcome your contributions and will treat yourthoughts and feelings with the respect you deserve.
    Online Community Coordinator

    Want to tell us about your experience on the community? Talk to our chatbot and let us know.
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  • OverlyAnxiousOverlyAnxious Member Posts: 1,057 Disability Gamechanger
    edited September 2020
    ernie2009 said:
    do most with anxiety and depression flap so much like me or is it just me?
    I'm not sure about most but it's definitely not just you.

    I have more trouble getting to sleep in the first place myself.  But will wake up around 6am every morning with flashbacks and intrusive thoughts flooding in.  And at that time, what can you do?  Too early to get up, too late to try and get back to get to sleep...  I put the radio on but can only have it on very quietly so as not to disturb the neighbours.

    I wish I could totally erase past events and start fresh, but I don't know of any service that offers that treatment yet!
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    leeCal said:
    Hi @ernie2009 have you thought of trying to do exercises during the day in order to help tire yourself out for bedtime? 

    I often wake wake up at 3/4 am and if I get irritated by it things are worse. So I try to remain calm and try to meditate very gently and mostly I fall back to sleep. Sometimes though I have to take a half dose of clonazepam but I avoid doing so as they are addictive. I also try not to nap during the day.

    best wishes.
    hi leecal, im quite a bit ristricted as regards exercies as both of my knees are shot and recently been diagnosed with upper and lower spinal problems including compression of spinal nerves which is basically shutting my right leg down alltogether and the other very weak so within a very short time will be wheelchair bound. my sleeping has been a problem for some years now and even when i havnt got things going around in my head i still struggle with sleep. my psychiatrist even says im a nightmare with the things i stress about. i really do find it so warming there are so many nice supportive people on here the likes ive never had before and cant thank you all enough.
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Ross_Scope said:
    Hi @ernie2009

    I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with your mental health, this community is here to support you and you are absolutely valued on here. Mental health can be cruel, and so can sleep problems, but you can absolutely beat them. 

    I'm glad that you have certain things like your iPod that help you eventually get to sleep. You might find this resource from the NHS useful, it has some good tips about combating sleeping problems that are simple to implement and could have a positive impact.

    I'm sorry that it took so long for your depression and anxiety to be diagnosed, but if your GPs and psychiatrist haven't been able to help you enough have you considered getting another referral? A new psychiatrist might have a different approach that works better for you. 

    Alternatively, there are services from the third sector like charitable organisations that offer fantastic support and could help you on the way to improving your mental health, see this page from Mind for further details. 

    Also, Samaritans offer a 24/7 phone line that will provide support if ever you want to just talk to someone.

    And of course this community is here as well, we always welcome your contributions and will treat yourthoughts and feelings with the respect you deserve.
    hi ross, i really cant thank you enough for this and your support. ive got my phychiatrist who is great but my problem is leaving the house. my mobility is next to nothing now and have many falls when i try to walk as my legs just give way the on top of this my mental health is getting worse by the day. i have a phychiatrist but also have another dr who deals with folks like me with mental health issues. i know it sounds crazy but im ok sort of as long as i havnt got to leave home and even dr,s appointments sends me into meltdowns. this is how bad i get, last wk my daughters car had a slight oil leak which was nothing now garage has sorted but at the time i was in meltdown in tears about it and thats how bad i get about things and it dosnt seam i get a break from it no peace of mind at all. i know we all have problems we have to put up with but i seem to make everything a monster problem and it just eats away at me. i dont think it has helped waiting so many years before being diagnosed but that was only by accident at 3 in the morning when i visited my loacl hospital. ive been in some bad places in my life so dont suppose thats helped but mental health has really dragged me down. if i didnt have my wife who is very strong i dont know where i would be. im really thankfull to eveyone who has shown and given me support i just cant thank you all enough.
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  • Ross_ScopeRoss_Scope Community Team Posts: 2,139 Pioneering
    Hi @ernie2009

    That's no problem :) 

    Have you had an assessment from an OT to determine any mobility aids that might be able to help you? 
    Online Community Coordinator

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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    OverlyAnxious said:
    ernie2009 said:
    do most with anxiety and depression flap so much like me or is it just me?
    I'm not sure about most but it's definitely not just you.

    I have more trouble getting to sleep in the first place myself.  But will wake up around 6am every morning with flashbacks and intrusive thoughts flooding in.  And at that time, what can you do?  Too early to get up, too late to try and get back to get to sleep...  I put the radio on but can only have it on very quietly so as not to disturb the neighbours.

    I wish I could totally erase past events and start fresh, but I don't know of any service that offers that treatment yet!
    hi there overyanxiuos, well im shocked as you sound just like me but am sorry you are going through it aswell.its very rare i get a lie in untill 6 3 to 3.30 is it for me as i wake mythering about something and as you know it can bejust about anything. if i take my meds im like a zombie and if dont im like a mad man (please excuse that bit). my doctor called me a few wks ago as she was concerned about a letter i had sent her. she offered me more mental health support but because i hate leaving home i said id let her know. at the moment ive got a pip telephone assessment going around in my head. i was awarded enhanced mobility and standard daily living with no end date date as im retired but me being honest wrote to dwp telling them about my condition so then had all the hastle and all new forms to fill in. im not worried about the assessment as ive been there twice before without problems but sometimes wonder if i do bring these things upon myself. i like to be honest that way there isnt any comeback and if i didnt would only worry about that so im damned either way i suppose. i hope you have a wonderfull day and a very big thank-you for taking time out in your day to support me.
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Ross_Scope said:
    Hi @ernie2009

    That's no problem :) 

    Have you had an assessment from an OT to determine any mobility aids that might be able to help you? 
    hi ross, yes i have thank you. just replied to your email.
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    I'm also a poor sleeper I suffer insomnia it's a nightmare I suffer from anxiety and depression too even when I'm asleep I worry but I try and take each day as it comes I have good days and very dark days 
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    willow12 said:
    I'm also a poor sleeper I suffer insomnia it's a nightmare I suffer from anxiety and depression too even when I'm asleep I worry but I try and take each day as it comes I have good days and very dark days 
    hi willow12, it dosnt matter what time i go to bed as 2 hours and im awake. most mornings im on here about 3 or 4 in the morning most days as im awake mythering about something. i dont have many good days to be honest and when i have a dark day as you put its bad very bad. hopefully you will have a good night tonight .
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Hi ernie2009 thank you for your message hope your ok yep am same as you don't matter how late I stay up I get about 3 hours sleep then bang I'm up worrying about the day ahead putting kettle on from about 4am then am awake all day till sometimes after midnight.
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Hope you have a better night tonight also ernie2009
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  • Tori_ScopeTori_Scope Community Team Posts: 2,818 Disability Gamechanger
    Are you getting any support for your depression, anxiety, and insomnia at the moment @willow12? You must be tired on 3 hours of sleep :( 
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Yes I am but I got offered sleeping tablets but refused too take them as 3 of my children are disabled 1 of my boys has epilepsy autism a non symmetrical brain hyper mobility sensory and learning issues so if he had fit through the night I wouldn't never forgive myself so I would rather suffer so I know my kids are safe 
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  • Tori_ScopeTori_Scope Community Team Posts: 2,818 Disability Gamechanger
    That's understandable @willow12. Do you think your anxiety affects your sleep at all? And have you spoken to anyone about your depression? You can share however much you feel comfortable sharing on here, there's no pressure, I'm only asking because we can link you to some resources if you want :) 
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Yes I think my anxiety affects my sleep alot and thank you 
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  • Tori_ScopeTori_Scope Community Team Posts: 2,818 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @willow12 :)

    Here's an article by the Sleep Foundation on the link between anxiety and trouble sleeping.

    Have you ever tried any techniques such as improving your 'sleep hygiene', or sleep restriction? I can give you some advice and post some resources if you think that might be useful?

    Are you interested in perhaps speaking to a therapist at all? That could help tackle all three problems, and you can make a self-referral without having to speak to your GP first.
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    Want to tell us about your experience on the community? Talk to our chatbot here and let us know what you think
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Thank you I'm on a waiting list too see a councillor 
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  • Tori_ScopeTori_Scope Community Team Posts: 2,818 Disability Gamechanger
    Great stuff @willow12! Give us a shout if you ever want some information and we can try and find some for you :) 
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    Want to tell us about your experience on the community? Talk to our chatbot here and let us know what you think
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Thank you means alot
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    willow12 said:
    Hi ernie2009 thank you for your message hope your ok yep am same as you don't matter how late I stay up I get about 3 hours sleep then bang I'm up worrying about the day ahead putting kettle on from about 4am then am awake all day till sometimes after midnight.
    hi willow12, ive only found one way of getting a full nights sleep and thats if i take more amitriptyline and metazapine than i supposed to then im like a zombie the next day and along with my mobility problems not good.i too suffer with anxiety and depression and have done for years but the past 10 years its got worse really off the scale some days. id just love one day when i didnt myther and had some peace of mind. i know exactly how you feel its not nice and some well most days in my case damn right cruel. i wish you well willow12 and hopefully a good nights sleep tonight.
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Thanks for your msg ernie2009 I have suffered with anxiety and depression for about 20 years been on al diff meds last ones was mitazipine but brought myself off them I couldn't function straight nx day was like zombie plus I have 6 kids too look after aswell so try manage without meds plus had a hard life lost my baby at 4 months pregnant last year lost my sister to a epileptic fit 20 years ago followed by my brother I got brought up in foster care etc but guess what keeps me going ? My 6 beautiful kids hope you manage too sleep tonight 
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    willow12 said:
    Thanks for your msg ernie2009 I have suffered with anxiety and depression for about 20 years been on al diff meds last ones was mitazipine but brought myself off them I couldn't function straight nx day was like zombie plus I have 6 kids too look after aswell so try manage without meds plus had a hard life lost my baby at 4 months pregnant last year lost my sister to a epileptic fit 20 years ago followed by my brother I got brought up in foster care etc but guess what keeps me going ? My 6 beautiful kids hope you manage too sleep tonight 
    wow willow you havnt had a lot of luck lately have you but as you say you have 6 beautiful kids in your life and am sure you proud of each and everyone of them as any mum would be. sleep tight and have a wonderfull day tomorrow.
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    Hi ernie2009 yes my kids are my world they mean alot too me they do keep me busy of course lol goodnight ernie godbless sleep well takecare hope you have a good day tomorrow  chat too you soon .
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    @ernie2009 Morning hope your well and that you managed some sleep last night 
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  • ernie2009ernie2009 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    willow12 said:
    @ernie2009 Morning hope your well and that you managed some sleep last night 
    hi willow12, went to bed at 10pm woke at 12.30. managed to get back off but up at 12 minutes past 3. once im awake thats it im afraid. hopefully you had a much better night than me and you are have a wonderfull day. sorry for delay in replying but had to go for check at hospital speak soon hopefully.
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  • willow12willow12 Member Posts: 280 Pioneering
    @ernie2009 afternoon had crap nights sleep as ever never mind it's just the norm for me something I just gotta live with I suppose hope your hospital check up went ok chat soon enjoy the rest of your day 
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