Hi, my name is suzielou!

suzielou
suzielou Online Community Member Posts: 2 Listener
I’m new to this community as a parent to a 14yr old daughter who has recently been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder.

Comments

  • bg844
    bg844 Online Community Member Posts: 3,883 Championing
    Hi @suzielou
    Welcome to the community :)
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,454 Championing
    A warm welcome to the community from me too @suzielou :) How are you doing today? 

    It's great to have you on board. Thank you for introducing yourself, and for telling us a bit about your daughter. 

    How are you both finding navigating this new diagnosis? Getting a new diagnosis can sometimes bring up some mixed feelings, so I'd be interested to hear how you've both been getting on. 

    Please feel free to take a look around the community, and get stuck in. Here are a few places you might like to visit:
    By looking through the autism and neurodiversity and children, parents, and families categories, you'll be able to see that we have many parents in a similar position to you here on the community. 

    I'm also wondering whether you might like to look into accessing one of our family services, if you feel you could benefit from some additional support. Navigate or Parents Connect may be of particular interest.

    If you need any help finding your way around the community, please don't hesitate to get in touch. 

  • suzielou
    suzielou Online Community Member Posts: 2 Listener
    hi, thankyou for the warm welcome and useful tips. I was genuinely relieved when they gave us the diagnosis but it’s been a long battle. I now have an answer as to why she struggled to go to mainstream school, why she finds it hard to make friends, and her little quirks make more sense now too. Atleast now I can get support for her. She struggled going to primary school but they said it was an attachment issue as she seemed fine when there (very shy though) but then she massively struggled when high school came. She just refused to go, her anxiety was through the roof. She would become violent towards me and she stopped going out of the house and speaking to her few friends. She hasn’t been to school for 2.5 yrs. Luckily since the diagnosis she has just been accepted and recently started a new setting for her education and particular needs. This is a tremendous weight off my mind, just need to try to get her to leave the house when not at the setting. She recently became upset because she is desperately lonely but said she doesn’t want to make friends at the new school because they are different, she wants “normal” friends. I explained that they are ‘normal’ like her, they just have difficulties in certain areas of life, like herself. She was upset with the diagnosis because she said it meant something was wrong with her but we chatted about it and I explained she isn’t any different now she has a diagnosis, it just means we have some answers now and can get more support for her. She seemed ok with this. Sorry for the long reply! 
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,454 Championing
    There's no need to apologise @suzielou! We're here to listen and chat :) I know it can be a good feeling to get things off of your chest, and talk to people who might understand what you're going through, at least to some extent. 

    I'm glad that having that conversation with her has helped her to make some more sense of her diagnosis. The kind of reaction she had, in terms of feeling like something must be 'wrong' with her, is quite normal. Hopefully, with time, she'll be able to see that it's not a negative thing. 

    Your GP may be able to provide you with some resources on speaking to your daughter about her diagnosis, too. 

    I had a quick Google, and there seem to be quite a few books designed for teenagers who've been diagnosed with autism. I don't have any personal recommendations, but perhaps you could take a look together and see whether any might interest her? 

    Fingers crossed she'll make some friends at hew new school and she settles in more. If she wants to make some friends outside of school, too, do you think she'd consider joining a social group that she could do outside of school? Does she have any particular interests or hobbies?