Help with Days out and mental health

Tegan
Tegan Online Community Member Posts: 19 Connected
in Everyday life

okay, really didn’t know what to title this post as so sorry if you have come here under false assumptions.

I have chronic pain and my mobility has got worse and I now use a rollator that converts to a wheelchair as I get that exhausted. But the problem is - I have no one to go with me so even if I get exhausted and can convert to my wheelchair, I can’t self propel myself.

I’m a widow and the disability came just after my husbands death, I don’t drive and I just feel cut off from the world. My parents (in their 70’s) visit every Sunday but that’s it for human interaction.

I miss nature - spotting butterflies, public gardens, trips to the seaside - are there groups that take people out for the day ? Like find a friend / carer ?

I just feel mentally drained in the house all the time. I have a garden but I can’t get to a garden centre to get anything and my parents are very controlling (even though it’s my house) so it’s exhausting to try and request things to be done how I want them.


I used to walk to a local park that was just within my pain tolerance, but unfortunately it’s become unsavoury so best avoided as a single female on my own.


sorry I am just blabbering on, I’m just looking for help without really knowing what I’m looking for 🤷🏼‍♀️


Tegan

Comments

  • charl1234
    charl1234 Online Community Member Posts: 239 Empowering

    Ask for a social services adult needs assessment they can provide carers to help you access community depends on circumstances u may need to help pay a contribution towards the cost but not of income is low, hope that helps

  • Littlefatfriend
    Littlefatfriend Online Community Member Posts: 123 Empowering

    Hi Tegan

    For a few years now I've volunteered with NHS Volunteer Responders, providing companionship telephone calls to people in your kind of situation. It's a very interesting thing to do and I encourage other people to have a go if they have some spare time. You could try it yourself, guidance is available from them.

    They also provide "Connect - whereby volunteers will accompany someone to an activity (volunteers support people to attend social/community based activities e.g. lunch club visit, walks, accompanying someone to do their own shopping)."

    It appears your GP or other healthcare professionals could refer you for that. I'm sure if you telephone them they can explain. In my experience they're very helpful.

    Here's a link to their website.

    https://nhscarevolunteerresponders.org/id-like-support

    Good luck

    Luke

  • GalDriver
    GalDriver Online Community Member Posts: 69 Empowering

    I'd suggest a motorised chair or scooter. They are so liberating! You can save your walking for around the house/garden where you have more control of when to rest. I whizz about on my chair and retain more independence than I would without it. You can find some good second hand ones if you don't want to fork out for a new one. I got one of mine off ebay. Good luck.

    P.S. You can even use them in shops if they are spacious enough.

  • Catherine21
    Catherine21 Posts: 5,581 Championing
    https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/133041/help-with-days-out-and-mental-health

    I'm sorry your experiencing this yes you deserve to be in nature and do things you want I hope you find someone 💗

  • Santosha12
    Santosha12 Online Community Member Posts: 1,122 Pioneering

    Hi @Tegan, I'm sorry for the loss of your husband and your situation, my situation is very similar and I can relate so well but with no family or local friends (hundreds of miles away) so very isolated.

    I contacted Age UK (I'm 62 though and you must be quite a bit younger) they were helpful and sent me a list of different contacts, I never went through it properly but it was for either help at home, care or accompanying out. I didn't make contact with any, mainly as I wouldn't be able to afford it financially.

    I'd initially contacted them about their days out via coach but I don't think that would have worked for me because of health problems and I think you have to be fairly independent as they didn't offer help for mobility needs etc. I use a walking stick but can't get very far (50 feet or so) so most of their days out were places that involve some degree of trekking around so the shopping trips wouldn't have worked for me, or say Llandudno as hilly I think, for me I'd need a wheelchair, whhch i dont have, too (gardens/flower shows/zoo etc) but I'd be OK for theatre say, just with stick as long as accessible area (I can't do stairs at all 🙄).

    There's so much we have to think about isn't there.

    It might be worth you contacting your local one as they may have a list similar to what I was sent of carers/helpers etc. (I'm going to re-look at the email they sent me to see and might contact any relevant ones in case I can save something to have a trip to look forward to).

    Also, is it worth you contacting your GP to see if their Social Prescriber have any ideas?

    Finally, I was going to join the U3A (again, could be older people but I don't know for sure). It's around 10.00 (ten) a year to join and I was going to join local interest groups like Archeology, family history, ukelele but they also arranged Events (theatre/ ? Outings) so it could be worth you looking at their website for your local area.

    I do hope you're able to find something, or rather somebody, that can work well for you. Thank you for posting 😊 (you weren't blabbering on at all) - your post reminds me that there can be options to do things we enjoy and are missing so much. I was very lucky to be rehomed in a council bungalow, it'll be 3 years ago in August, but since being unable to work, the isolation is very acute!

    Take good care and very warmest wishes to you. PS sorry for long post, it's all or nothing with me and I can tend to go off on a tangent ! 😅

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