Friends/family of my partner have financial & care concerns on us moving in together
Options
teasweetly
Scope Member Posts: 3 Listener
My partner and I are wanting to move in together, yet we have had some difficult reactions from my partners friends/family.
They start by saying to her, "I love *me*, nothing against *me*" then just say they are worried about her financially supporting me and she needs to "protect herself" or "he's very unwell" and are worried about her caring for me.
My partner was pushed to tears by the comments as no one was offering up any solutions or offering their support just catastrophising their concerns.
It basically feels like people are saying: "I'm great but disabled". I understand no one dreams of our reality but we have built a good relationship and everyone has known I was disabled from the start.
Does anyone have advice for what to do, what we should say to people? I feel very stuck now as my partner has told me what people have said to her so It will be awkward the next time I see them.
Thank you!
Comments
-
Hello @teasweetly
Welcome to the community!
I am so sorry that you are going through that with them. If you and your partner want to live together than that's your business. It's your relationship. If they question or comment you could just very calmly say "it is our relationship, we will decide what is best for us as we are the two parties in it." If they push anymore then maybe go low contact for a while? Sometimes distance can make people realise how offensive they are being.Hannah - She / Her
Online Community Coordinator @ Scope
Concerned about another member's safety or wellbeing? Flag your concerns with us.
Want to give us feedback? Complete our feedback form now.
Brightness
Categories
- All Categories
- 13.1K Start here and say hello!
- 6.7K Coffee lounge
- 69 Games lounge
- 387 Cost of living
- 4.3K Disability rights and campaigning
- 1.9K Research and opportunities
- 200 Community updates
- 9.3K Talk about your situation
- 2.1K Children, parents, and families
- 1.6K Work and employment
- 773 Education
- 1.7K Housing and independent living
- 1.4K Aids, adaptations, and equipment
- 590 Dating, sex, and relationships
- 363 Exercise and accessible facilities
- 739 Transport and travel
- 31.9K Talk about money
- 4.4K Benefits and financial support
- 5.2K Employment and Support Allowance (ESA)
- 17.2K PIP, DLA, and AA
- 5K Universal Credit (UC)
- 6.2K Talk about your impairment
- 1.8K Cerebral palsy
- 872 Chronic pain and pain management
- 181 Physical and neurological impairments
- 1.1K Autism and neurodiversity
- 1.2K Mental health and wellbeing
- 317 Sensory impairments
- 820 Rare, invisible, and undiagnosed conditions