Wife/Carer - cancer ?
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No - we have different surgeries (in different towns / counties but that's a different matter)
I also cannot speak on the phone !
It's my wife's mood swings that really concern me. one minute she's happy, I do one thing "wrong" and you would think the world had ended - she turns BLACK and I get her full wrath (not physical I must add) more VERBAL
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I am concerned that she will need an operation and SOON - ie) perhaps next week - which does not give me any time to arrange for carers etc (I do have "savings" so no PAID for care)
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Before I do anything - I await the return of my wife (she will be around 1 1/2 hours) in case it is not as bad as we think - but I believe that it is cancer….
if it is - she will get 6 weeks post op reablement care - but will that include myself ?
i can't image a carer coming in - ignoring me and concentrating soley on my wife ?
And what about the week (or so) that she will be in hospital for - what would happen to me ? It's way too late to arrange carers for next week (if it is then)
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Is it worth my applying for Continuing Health Care ?
Everything is broken/not working on my body *except my brain (surprisingly since that is what started my decline)
my arms. shoulders, knees, heart all bad
I cannot walk 1 yard, (knees shot). my shoulders are riddled with arthritis and tendonitis, my heart beats too fast and irregularly
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I think you need to try something and email communication with your GP would be a good first step then they can liaise with those other services. You will not be left alone without care.
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I had a care needs assesment 4 years ago
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Thinking of you and your wife
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Waiting for results via GP
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OK Wife received a text, yesterday at 8:00 - telling her to expect a phone call between 9:00 and 11:00 - no mention of what it was about or the name of the doctor…
Come 11:00 - no call - so my wife checked her NHS account on-line and discovered that she would receive a call NEXT Monday - so they had sent the wrong info in the text….
They obviously have the results of her cancer scan - but are now forcing my wife to wait, another week for results !
You would hope that the results are negative.
Not exactly a good surgery.
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I agree but my wife doesn't appear to want to complain
I would be EXPLODING about their mistake - but she just says "What's the point"Sometimes I really do give up.
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Hi Wibbles, I am keeping everything possible crossed that your wife's results are negative. I agree though with everything @MW123 has said. Perhaps a care assessment for yourself will put you in a position of just knowing what support you can have, if and when needed; if not now, then in the future. It doesn't do any harm to investigate this. Take good care and very warmest wishes.
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I asked my council adult social care (OT) contact a few years ago, what I should do if my wife was ever "out of action" and was told that because I had savings of over £23.25k - I was on my own !!
They didn't even want to do a Care Needs Assessment on me because "all my needs are being provided by my wife and the occupational therapist (OT) requirement has been carried out, so no support plan is necessary" but eventually, they sent a woman (who couldn't speak proper English) to assess me - her written report was awful (poorly written and full of mistakes) and when I pointed this out - I was told that since I was not receiving any assistance, it was unimportant……….
I did manage to get a few rails and grab handles fitted by OT and an electric adjustable bed.
Also a power wheelchair which came after the OT assessment courtesy of NHS !
She was unable to grasp the concept that if my wife was ill / left me - I would be alone and due to my disability, would be unable cope from day 1 and would need instant help - so eventually I gave up and kept my fingers crossed that it would never happen.
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@Wibbles It might be time to consider your wife not being able to continue being your Carer and looking at other options.
You could perhaps go to a Day Centre once or twice a week to give your wife a break.
I cared for my mother when she had cancer and she came to live with me and it is the hardest job I have ever done. It is usually done by family and unfortunately there is little help for carers.
Carers coming in is usually just for 15 or 30 minutes a time sometimes it can be arranged they come in four times a day.
The other option could be respite care where you would go into a care home for a week to give your wife a break.
I think you wife being unwell now has brought to a head that you need to do something.
I hope you manage to sort something out.
Take care.
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Thanks - yes my wife does need a break - she has cared for me for over 20 years without a single day break !
She has only been claiming Carers Allowance for less than half of the time too !
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I understand his wife was offered a Carers Assessment and she turned it down.
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I'm sorry to hear that you're wife/carer is going through cancer
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We still don't know whether that's the case or not
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OK - she has heard from her surgery
She's got "endometrial polyps" - which are PROBABLY NOT cancerous - she was told this by email - how impersonal can you get ?
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Blimey, they told her by email @Wibbles?! But despite the delivery, hopefully that's reassuring news that it's unlikely to be cancerous. Have they spoken to her about any treatment options?
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