I wish I’d known... — Scope | Disability forum
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I wish I’d known...

leeCal
leeCal Member Posts: 5,103 Disability Gamechanger
What are some of the things you wished you’d known when you were young, or what advice would you give your young self if you could go back in time?

I think one thing I’d definitely tell my younger self is not to take life so seriously!

How about you? ?

“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”


― Dalai Lama XIV
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Comments

  • RacheleLeahSilvera
    RacheleLeahSilvera Member Posts: 77 Courageous
    @leeCal
    Great thread
    How hard it would be to get a job.
  • janer1967
    janer1967 Member Posts: 15,112 Disability Gamechanger
    I would tell anyone to live life to the full, take every opportunity you can to make new memories, forget about the things you cant change and focus on what you can change

    Dont be afraid to make changes in your life if your not happy .

    Be kind and give back to those less fortunate than you   
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 1,651 Connected
    I wish I'd known before I left school that failing everything except typing at GCSE would affect me nearly 30 years later when looking for work, as if the disability related issues weren't enough to put most potential employers off.

    Also, on Valentine's 1991, my then GF actually said to me "Are we gonna get married then?" and me being 14 going on 15 at the time said "Ooh I don't know"! I half wish I'd said "Yeah alright then" or something.


  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 6,507 Disability Gamechanger
    edited December 2020
    I wish I’d known that computer game characters are essentially worthless and all the probably thousands of hours I put into my RuneScape and World of Warcraft characters would not gain me any knowledge or strength or money in real life and I could have spent those hours developing my knowledge or working to make money!

    I have about 100 days of played time across all games which is 2400 hours. That’s 6 A levels assuming 400 hours study per subject; or £24000 at £10 an hour if I worked those hours.

    That said I couldn’t work and I found it hard to study and I did enjoy what I did so maybe it’s not all bad. :)
  • leeCal
    leeCal Member Posts: 5,103 Disability Gamechanger
    edited December 2020
    I agree @66Mustang that we can view our time as wasted or spent. I spend a lot of time doing very little but I quite enjoy it and so it’s spent, not wasted. I spent many years computer programming which in the end turned out to be fruitless financially but I enjoyed stretching myself and became pretty good at it. I therefore spent those years doing something I enjoyed, not a waste of time really.

    “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”


    ― Dalai Lama XIV
  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 6,507 Disability Gamechanger
  • Cher_Inactive
    Cher_Inactive Posts: 4,412

    Scope community team

    Gosh, I was thinking about this this very morning,  One thing I do wish is that I could go back and tell my teenage self that she was good enough.  I was very poorly for a long time and always compared myself negatively to my 'well' peers.  I so wish my younger self knew how brave she was and that everything would turn out okay.  

    Hindsight eh! 
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  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 1,651 Connected
    @Cher_Scope off topic but did you read my thing yet?

  • Cher_Inactive
    Cher_Inactive Posts: 4,412

    Scope community team

    @MrAllen1976 It's on my to-do list for tomorrow when I have a fresh pair of eyes :)  I'll get in touch with you when I've read it.
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  • vikingqueen
    vikingqueen Member Posts: 684 Pioneering
        I wish I'd known that my parents really did know what they were talking about.... :# .But saying that I wouldn't be where I am today which is right where I want to be with the people I love,  quite a few bumps in the road along the way but I got here in the end
  • woodbine
    woodbine Community Co-Production Group Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    I'd wish i'd known   that social justice is important  (something that I didn't really appreciate until I was in my late 40's).
    Be extra nice to new members.
  • leeCal
    leeCal Member Posts: 5,103 Disability Gamechanger
    Thanks everybody for your thoughts on this subject, very interesting too, thank you.
    ?

    “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”


    ― Dalai Lama XIV
  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 6,507 Disability Gamechanger
    @leeCal

    I agree and as a young(ish) person I am trying to take on board the knowledge that people wish they had when they were perhaps my age
  • leeCal
    leeCal Member Posts: 5,103 Disability Gamechanger
    edited December 2020
    @vikingqueen said
    I wish I'd known that my parents really did know what they were talking about

    Me too. I remember thinking that they were from a different generation, that somehow that generation experienced a very different life and so couldn’t really relate to me or my issues. Later I experienced the same kind of attitude from my own children and it’s such a shame that youngsters won’t learn from older people enough. 

    The old saying ‘you can’t put an old head on young shoulders’ Holds true to quite a degree. It’s just makes me sad when I see people making he same old mistakes over and over. 

    “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”


    ― Dalai Lama XIV
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Posts: 8,195

    Scope community team

    Same @66Mustang! I'm making notes furiously. That being said, I think I still have some advice for my younger self:

    No one cares as much as you think they do - not in a bad way, but people aren't judging your every move waiting for you to trip up and make a mistake that they'll remember forever
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  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 6,507 Disability Gamechanger
    Same @66Mustang! I'm making notes furiously. That being said, I think I still have some advice for my younger self:

    No one cares as much as you think they do - not in a bad way, but people aren't judging your every move waiting for you to trip up and make a mistake that they'll remember forever
    That’s a really good one and I’d say it works both ways in that no one cares when you do something impressive as well. I used to do a good reverse park or golf shot then hope someone saw and now I realise no one notices!
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Posts: 8,195

    Scope community team

    Not always @66Mustang, but it's a great moment when they do! I once threw a bottle into a bin whilst walking on an empty pavement from a reasonably impressive distance (I fully expected to have to pick it up and put it in). I didn't think anyone else was around me, but it turned out there was someone walking behind me, who then gave me a high five. Pre Covid times of course...
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  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 6,507 Disability Gamechanger
    Haha that’s funny:smiley:
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 1,651 Connected
    edited December 2020
    I wish I'd known circa 2002 that the week I went in respite at the place up Woodhouse would be a complete waste of time and the socials' money, I kind of expected it would be but I went anyway, 3 days later I'm on the phone to come Home, all I did was stay in my room playing Xbox.

    I didn't need to go in respite to do that.

    I also kind of wish I didn't have a "sixth sense" of predicting that some aspect of whatever I'm doing will go wrong when I'm doing something major, because more often than not if I predict something will go wrong it does.

    I wish I was that good at predicting the Lottery numbers lol.

  • leeCal
    leeCal Member Posts: 5,103 Disability Gamechanger
    @Tori_Scope other people think pretty much the same as you or I think generally speaking. It’s because of our similarities we have gelled into societies which by and large get on well, there is a general consensus.

    sometimes I watch others out of interest, ie people watching can be fascinating. And sometimes I judge them internally and sometimes I don’t. I think we can assume that others do the same by and large. ?

    “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”


    ― Dalai Lama XIV

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