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Struggling to remain positive

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  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Hope you are ok.  I did not realise last night you said you are going into hospital.  Sorry I just want to know that everything will work out.

    I have been several times more like a quarter of my life.  So I can imagine right now you are feeling anxious.  Any body would be.

    My thought and prayers will be with you.  I wish all the best and to reassure you that the care you will receive, I know will be OK.

    Thanks for asking about me.  Weekends always hard to overcome and I try to catch up on housework, plus tidy up.  I need to do something a bit of exercise. I have no hoover so it is sweeping the floor.  I have vinyl easy to clean.  On with the Marigolds and a bit of upbeat music away we go.  Take my time, usually few breaks.   Into Sunday as well.  Pressing engagement my Ironing.

    Weekends get frustrated more with myself some days are bad.  Just had a request some on asked about Spices.  Anyway thought I do Tagine Moroccan Stew typed it all out.  In  Coffee Lounge near the end.  Pressed some button to correct something.  My fingers not good typing today, stuck and then wiped the lot off.

    I will redo it again sometime this weekend, I hope.

    Ragu Sauce is a tomato based sauce in Italy with tomatoes, onions.  Can have carrot, celery sticks diced red wine not for me or white wine.  Some regions of Italy use garlic some do not, some use peppers.

    You can have chillies in it.  It is simple sauce to make.

    I am glad you are by way bit better sleeping, it varies for me.  Lots of trials and errors.

    Do I have tattoos no I am afraid not, too hairy.  Sorry if I put a picture in your head.  No room hairy little monster I am my joke.

    I won't ask you  I am a gentleman .  I never ask a lady.

    Also great wheelchair working out, is it a powered one.  I have used one a few times.  Hard at first with my hands.  I can walk have walking issues.  I had on when I ill and had problems walking.  I am afraid I had muscle wastage due to addiction.  So they offered me sticks and wheel chair.  That was a while ago.

    I manage to be better now still problems walking have got muscles back in legs and lot has changed.  Took me about ten years plus to sort myself out.

    All I can say take you time recovering and small steps.  We as a community want you to get better.  I am a lot older than you may I say and it has taken me about ten years plus.  To recover.  I have bad days, good days so I am afraid that always will be there.

    The main thing you have your Mother around you.

    I hope what ever you are doing today or tomorrow take care.

    I hope to speak again I assume I will speak to before you go into hospital.

    In my thoughts and prayers.

    Your friend
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  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good evening @thespiceman I am ok thank you, how are you? :) Thank you for your well wishes, I appreciate it :) I don't feel as anxious as I thought I would be - ask me again the day before and I most likely be a nervous wreck, but I keep telling myself that this needs to be done. I never thought I would say this but I really miss cleaning, and even putting a load in the washing machine, just the independence of little things I do miss. I can imagine your frustration when that happened! Hopefully one day when I feel brave enough I will try a ragu sauce, when I do I will let you know :) Thank you for being a gentleman as always :) I will tell you anyway - I have a butterfly on my left wrist. Had it done in 2013 - wanted something to symbolise the struggles I had faced over the years (Anorexia, Abuse, Bullies, Depression, etc) and that I had overcome them. Butterflies have a special meaning to me, They are truly beautiful :) No it's just a standard wheelchair but with bigger wheels at the back and foot rests. The one I currently use was my step-grandads, my nan was going to get rid of it (he died almost 9 years ago) but due to my balance and walking quickly deteriorating I was desperate for a wheelchair, so she gave me it , she couldn't find the foot rests which I didn't mind I was just extremely thankful for the wheelchair. I wished for bigger wheels so I could gain some independence back, move myself so it can give mum a break from pushing me all the time. As long as the WiFi in the house is working then I will always be on here - apart from when I am asleep! Thank you I hope you have a relaxing Sunday :) Talk soon, my dear friend :) Ami xxx
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  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Good evening thank you for lovely words from a gentleman to a lady.

    Understand I have been reading some of the post about going into hospital.  If you do not mind plenty of advice there.  Support, kind words, messages.

    I forgot to mention a lot of hospitals now have chaplins to do prayers and anything else like communion and it helped me when I was in hospital last time.  Useful to talk some one like a chaplin , very soothing.

    I know you be OK.

    Tattoos a butterfly that's really nice.  I am admit not a big fan of loads of them all over the body.  I am old fashioned gent.  Not bad like that if it means a symbol or means something that's good is it not.

    I like butterflies.  I have been to a butterfly park where you can walk around and butterflies fly.  It was some sort of tropical park with heated rooms.  Those large ones very beautiful to look at.

    I hope you can get about safely in your wheelchair.  I suppose your Mother is guiding you.

    I just want to say thank you this week for giving me a chance to talk with you.

    I have made a friend, please can I say also hope you are feeling better and I have been of some use.

    I hope you get a good night sleep

    Always in my thoughts and prayers

    Your friend The Spiceman



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  • JennysDad
    JennysDad Community member Posts: 2,299 Disability Gamechanger
    So lovely to hear from you, @Ami2301

    I'm okay, thank you. Miscellaneous aches and pains, but embarrassingly insignificant compared to so many people on here.

    I'd pretty much forgotten about DLF myself until I did some research, but I did some temp work as a warehouseman/dogsbody with my local authority's disability services and encountered all sorts of gadgets and gizmos that were DLF related. If you haven't already done so it might be worth checking out your local authority website to see if they offer any services.

    And the last thing you could be accused of is being big-headed :) Courage, bravery and related words are a bit odd, in a way, because people think they know what they mean and often do not. The chap who charges the enemy lines, under orders and with a rifle in his hands, may be very brave, but he may also just be dim and unimaginative. Would he do it if he really understood what the potential consequences were? Whereas someone like you already knows the consequences and can only too well imagine what other consequences may develop. You don't even have to have much of an imagination or understanding of anything else to understand what those consequences are. Yet you go on braving them, go on facing them, and that, Ami, is courage.

    Proud to know you, here for you to whatever extent I can be,
    Warmest best wishes to you and mum,
    Richard
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good afternoon, @thespiceman How has your Sunday been so far? :)Ithaca I am extremely overwhelmed with all the love, advice and support that I have been receiving! Thank you all :) I too have been to a butterfly and wildlife park, when I was younger, they were in a heated room/area too. It was a beautiful experience seeing all these butterflies fly around, eat fruit, settle on leaves etc. Sadly I think the centre closed down. I do wish to visit another place like it :) The year before last, when I was out walking one day, I noticed a butterfly in the middle of the lane, but only one wing was fluttering, I checked to see if any cars were coming and then I went and picked the butterfly up. Walked back to side of the road and was just fixated by it. It had purple wings, velvet to stroke. Even though it had a broken wing it was the most fragile, most stunning butterfly I had ever come across. I placed it on the hedge next to me so it was safe. A lovely memory I cherish :) No need to thank me :) that's what friends are for :) You have definitely made an impact on me since we first spoke! I sincerely thank you for that! :) Talk soon, my good friend :) Ami xxx
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good afternoon @RichardVR Hope you're not experiencing too many aches and pains today :) Thank you for your amazing and kind words as always :) I am also here for you, always :) Your good friend, Ami xxx
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Good afternoon hope you had a good night sleep, I can understand being anxious.

    Hope your Sunday going OK.

    My Sunday going smoothly for once, did dishes, little chores.  Plus washing out, got rain up here next few days. So I need to get that sorted.

    Going to any where that is some what strange like a hospital.  Maybe you will be nervous and on edge, never easy.

    One tip I always had was plan something after wards.  To try to not think about what is happening.

    I know you will be OK .You have got a lot of support.

    I like your story about the stray butterfly most considerate and caring.

    I like nature and do watch what I can regarding wildlife programmes on TV.  I just know that I do enjoy specific ones and animals, birds.

    The Blue Planet was on .  I did not watch it not my sort of wildlife.  Like Dolphins, big cats mainly Cheetahs, Tigers also Birds of Paradise, Parrots, Birds of Prey, Penguins,Chimpanzees, Gorillas

    Like many others, what do like animals?  Like my Horses as well, Elephants

    When I was a child and into early adulthood wanted to be a vet.  Too many qualifications to go to do..

    Then I enrolled as a kennel hand at a cattery, kennels.  Learnt how to care for animals, cats, dogs, horses.  Lasted into my twenties.  Then I was unfortunately not required any more.  Being a volunteer.

    Had the chance to look after many varied other animals, breeds of dog.  Favourite an Irish Wolfhound huge dog.  Lovely nature.

    I had cats till few years ago.  My mental state could not cope.  Had this Cat who would constantly attack me.  Always had Queens which are Female a lot more docile.

    This was enough I had to remove it to an animal charity.  One of those things I am afraid.

    Miss a dog but it is walking the dog ,vet bills, food care and the rest.  Some days not good would have fear that I could not cope.

    Lots of good memories that is important to me.  As it to you.  Life is so short.  I need to remember the good times.  Being of an age now.  I can remember certain memories.

    Yet can not remember what I am said to you yesterday, I have to recheck.  Played a song other day could not remember title or artist.  Had to look.

    I am glad we have met, really nice to know you.  Makes the day when some one is on the forum that sends you kind words or responses I get.

    Thank you Ami

    I hope the rest of your weekend goes great and speak to you soon.

    Take care my friend


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  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @thespiceman

    I did have a better nights sleep, thank you, I hope you slept well too :)

    Glad to read that your Sunday is going well, I have been replying to all you lovely people all day - OK I napped for a couple of hours haha.

    I used to love watching animal programmes, specifically the one that Ben Fogle and a woman with curly hair presented, at Longleat in Dorset - not sure if the programme is still on TV. I was lucky enough go go there during a holiday. It was amazing being up close with all the animals, we didn't drive through the monkey area as they are known for taking away car parts - our car at the time was just about holding together so we didn't want to tempt fate haha!

    Apart from butterflies...it's difficult to choose a favourite as all animals fascinate me!

    Was that your dream job? Or did you want to try something else?

    Our family had tons of animals back when I was a child. I always described it as like it were living in a zoo. We had cats, birds, fishes, Guinea pigs, hamsters. Obviously over the years nature took its place and was left with one cat. Then Christmas Eve 2005, we got a puppy, a Labrador cross Doberman, we named her Millie. I will be upfront about this, sadly she had to be put to sleep in 20116, very sudden, I'm not mentally strong enough to talk about how much she meant to me. It's still incredibly raw. I will always cherish her, the photos we have together, the times we had together.

    Chat soon, my dear friend :)

    Ami xxx
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  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Thank you for reply, yes I had a good sleep.  Thank you.  Just a quiet day.  Hope to chat a bit more this week.

    Look forward to talking about anything you wish.

    I used to work had jobs in Government Departments can not tell you what the role was.  Sorry still bound by Official Secrets Act.  I did not know I was till I applied for jobs.  You can say this but you cannot say that.

    Done many other jobs up to about early 1990.

    Then my ideas for business flourished.  Had an interest in buying selling various collectables.  Do you collect anything?

    Bought, sold all over UK mainly though in The North.  Now and again London and very rarely the South.

    Unfortunately got ill with addiction plus ill mentally.  So had to pack them in any future jobs.  Also other personal problems

    Still do now and again wish I had set up my ideas for a few business ventures.

    Had issues with employment agencies, funding, financial problems.

    Please can I ask have you got a dream job.?  Have you worked I think you said you have.?

    What would you like to do?

    I am sorry about your loss.  I get too attached to any of my pets so it hurts me as well. So hard to lose them.  Have none now.

     I get very emotional about cruelty and the abuse of any creature.

    It is not right that people do this.  Long over due for changes for animal welfare.

    I have stepped in few times to stop some one hurting or abusing animals.

    Even told some one about a lad stealing birds eggs.  That is really cruel and sadistic doing that harming young of birds.

    I hope to speak to you soon.

    Always in my thoughts and prayers

    Your friend


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  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good evening @thespiceman How are you? :) How has your day been? You shall remain the mystery man! My partner and I collect Marvel/DC items, figures, comics, clothes, anything really - that's what bought us together, our love for superheroes. When I was at school I done work experience at Barnardos, it was the best 2 weeks of my life. So much so I carried on volunteering for a year. Then i got my first paid job as a cashier at Iceland. Worked there for 3 and a half years. Then we moved back to where I'm originally from. I didn't work for the first 8 months as my anxiety was through the roof. I then started volunteering at Sue Ryder and 6 months later I was fortunate enough to get a paid job there. Sadly I lost my job as I was no longer fit for the role as my health went downhill. My passion is charity work and I really do hope I can get more involved with charity fundraisers, etc. I get emotionally attached to animals way too quickly too. It's sickening to think the amount of animal cruelty that goes on. Good on you for stepping in and stopping them! Chat soon my dear friend :) Ami xxxx
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Good Evening how are you feeling today.  I am much feeling Monday.

    Just had a veggie yes Meatfree Monday.  On tonights menu vegetable curry with rice and chickpeas.

    Pears and custard.  Sorry you are too faraway would do instant takeaway.  If I could.

    Have you been to Comic Con I am interested in not too much Marvel Comics but I know about Stan Lee and few of the collectors I met.  I believe big fair in LA the States.

    I assume you enjoy doing that and I bet you could talk like I do about food.

    Why not?  I do think TV film spin off's are I know much in demand.  My favourite TV memorabilia was I had a collection of stills from the first series on TV. Star Trek released in the sixties when it all began..  All signed by cast the original cast may I add.

    I sold it to a private collector.  Paid me a nice sum.  Also had two photos of Batman and Robin signed by Adam West and Burt Ward.  Kept dipping in and out.

    Big fair I believe in London Astoria or was it Westminster Hall wandering around

    Spent a lot of time meeting collectors, useful to me.  Collected Elvis stuff records, books anything.  This was seventies into eighties.  Unfortunately due to personal reason had to sell..

    Then Dr Who and collectors beginning to look at Cult TV like The Saint and The Prisoner.  This was the early eighties.

    May I ask what is your favourite piece?.  One thing may I add to look out for are  Bubblegum cards and Trade cards of Marvel Comics.  These were issued with sweets and other goods like cereal packet etc.

    Not too expensive issued in the eighties and nineties worth a look.

    I find all film history and backgrounds of films totally absorbing.  How they are created.

    I am sorry what happened about your work and volunteering.

    I sure one day you will succeed, I know you will.  I can sense the determination.

    Hope you take care.

    Always in my thoughts and prayers.

    Your friend Mystery Man The Spiceman
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  • JennysDad
    JennysDad Community member Posts: 2,299 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @thespiceman and @Ami2301
    I'm really missing chatting with the two of you, though I'm keeping up on all your posts - it is just that I'm being really busy welcoming newcomers to the community and helping direct people to resources. I've lost track of the number of posts I've responded to, and I'm hoping that things will either calm down a little shortly or we'll be able to recruit more 'meeters and greeters'.
    Missing you guys.
    With affection,
    Richard
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good evening @thespiceman
    Have been very tired today but otherwise OK thank you :)
    Again, another meal I shall have to try when I feel brave enough :)
    My partner and I have not been to a Comin Con yet. He is in the process of getting his costume together for the next Comic Con. I would love to go but am worried that I would tire too quickly from all the excitement. 
    I like talking about it but nowhere near as my partner does. He never stops talking about it - sometimes I am glad I am mod/sev deaf because he does repeat himself sometimes.
    I don't have a prized possession yet, I do have an obsession with Loki "The God of Mischief" and the actor Tom Hiddleston. I hope that one day I am lucky enough to meet him, and to be able to collect Loki memorabilia.
    Thank you, that really means a lot :)
    Hope to speak soon :)
    That would make a great superhero name!
    Your Butterfly Friend :)
    Ami xxx
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good evening @RichardVR
    We miss you too!
    The amount of new members has completely blossomed! :)
    I have been welcoming as many as I can but I just can't keep up!
    Hopefully we can chat soon! :)
    Ami xxx
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @RichardVR Good Morning How are you?  I am always here just look after others first, they are more important than me.

    May I say I believe you are not well.  I read one post had aches and pains.  That is important too, your health.  Remember @thespiceman is here for solutions and to ease, soothe any health worries.

    The main thing is to for you to use your expertise, knowledge to assist help others.

    Me and you always have time for each other.  Seeing new people to help with problems comes first.

    I caught up some new people , spoken to @Victoriad .  Gave a few recipes, chat.  Have not spoken for a while.  That was a lovely time.

    Love speaking to @Ami2301 as you can see.  Makes my day.  May I say all the people I can.

    Give them all my time, warmth, charisma, friendship.  In fact they all help me to give my day a more positive outlook.  I do not feel lonely and give inspiration.

    Thank to all of you. 

    Take care my friend
    Your doing a most excellent job
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  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Good morning Hope you slept well.  I might think that could be an idea for you to go if you are up to it.

    Comic Con I suppose it all depends how well you are.  That comes first.  Just could be something to look forward to.  May I say some time with your partner, spending time together.

    Little precious moments.

    Loki if I recall that is a Norse God of Mischief.  I think Jim Carrey was that in The Mask.

    I do get things wrong.

    I hope you do meet Tom Hiddleston.  You can do anything.

    When I buying and selling.  I met a few stars of Stage and Screen.  These were collectors.  If I recall.  Some of them were on TV.  I am not a name dropper.

    Very polite, sincere and I never asked for autographs.  Just me I suppose.
    What ever you are doing today.

    Take care speak to you later

    Your Mystery Man yes good Superhero name
    Where's that Telephone Box to change in it

    Your Friend

    The Spiceman
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  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good afternoon @thespiceman I slept OK thank you :) How has your day been? Once I get my diagnosis and try and get my health back on track then Comic Con will definitely be a must! I think the best film that Jim Carrey was in, has to be The Mask, who is your favourite actor? Thank you :) Each role that Tom Hiddleston has acted out has been pure, magnificent and simply inspiring. Plus he is majorly (majorly times by infinity) handsome which is a bonus lol An autograph or a photo with Tom would be something I would cherish forever. I would be more than elated just to have a conversation with him - though I would struggle due to being deaf. Nevertheless, even if I was to know he spoke to me, I would feel like the luckiest girl in the universe! Same as yesterday, napping and replying to you lovely people! Why not a spice cupboard instead? :) Your catchphrase could be "What spice are you today?" Chat soon, Your Butterfly Friend :)
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  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello  @Ami2301 Thank you for reply, Good evening.  What Spice are you today.

    I like it.  I am a chilli man.  Known as The Chilli Man. sometimes.  Like chilli's all types and various forms.

    I just bought Tub of Harissa.  Made with Chilli's has in rose petals plus other ingredients.

    Have loads of chilli products like Tabasco, Worcestershire sauce.  Mexican Spice blends, Chinese types..  Got jars of all sorts of spices.  Have a big selection.  Use a lot.

    Always looking to add collection.  Looking at buying different spice blends.

    What have you being doing today.

    I have had a pressing engagement.  My ironing my joke.

    Tidy up.  Tired to day just had meds starting to take effect.

    Films my favourite stars James Stewart, John Wayne, Humphrey Bogart,  James Cagney  All old legends of films long ago.

    Also Fred Astaire, Gene Kelly, Judy Garland.  Orson Welles Marilyn Monroe Monroe

    Like Kate Winslet, Cate Blanchett.  Michael Caine, Sean Connery.

    I can not understand modern films need subtitles to read.

    Film on today why they put this sort of film on weekend.

    Called The Misfits with Marilyn Monroe, Clark Gable.  Romantic drama.  Clark Gables last film, died after filming.  Marilyn died a year later.

    I hope to speak to soon

    Going to sleep in the arms of angels

    Take care


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  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Good evening @thespiceman

    I am afraid I have no knowledge of spices apart from The Spice Girls haha!

    I have never heard of some the actors you have listed, sorry! Judy Garland was stunning in The Wizard of Oz. Michael Caine, true English gent! 

    I do love the classic Disney films, not so keen on all these new live-action remakes. 

    Hope you have a good nights sleep my good friend :)

    Chat soon :)

    Ami xxx
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Ami2301 Good Morning How are you?  Yes I like it Good only Spices are the Spice Girls.

    Girl Power why not?  What is happening with Ladies and the sexual harassment in the work place, equal pay.  Long over due to sort it all out.  Makes me ill to see you ladies treated badly and taken advantage of.

    I hope there is justice for all you Sisters.  No matter what, also all of us should respect each other.

    I was once told by a lad in a job I was in.  The following quote Men may rule the world, but it is you Ladies pulling the strings.  Which of course as a gentleman could agree more.

    I miss having a lady in my life to talk things over.  Help and assist on what I might need to wear.  Not good fashion sense.  Like to look good and smart, but casual.

    Need a suit or choosing the right tie contacting one of my lady friends.  Had more idea than I had.  Then afterwards lunch.

    I use by way talking of spices for my own health needs.  Spices like chilli have uses for colds for example.

    The films I like you probably won't know any, the film stars of those days.  Talking about the 40's and 50's.  Were part of the studio system.  Being part of contracted to a film studio.  Told to do when and what by studio.  Even told now with current situation, inappropriate behaviour and censorship were the attitudes then.  No one really knew what was going on.

    Many film stars were silenced by the studios.  These were big names M.G.M, Warner Bros,  RKO.  In those days also the films were black and white.  Series of films called Film Noir all shot, filmed mainly at night.  Hence the name.

    Little bit of film history. for you this morning. 

    Looks like bad weather is on the way again.  Forecast for snow cold weather.

    What ever you are doing to day have a pleasant day.  I am here anytime.

    Please can I say some days have usual household duties to do .  Will get back to you as soon as possible.

    I know sent a post a bit late, get tired a lot with illness and some days most really.  Have pain took meds plus painkillers.  Wrote to you.  Almost falling a sleep.

    Take care

    Always in my thoughts and prayers.
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