Need advice about a neighbour — Scope | Disability forum
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Need advice about a neighbour

SJS89 Member Posts: 5 Listener
edited August 2020 in Autism and neurodiversity
Hi everyone! 

I am sorry if this is not an appropriate place to come to with this but I just need some advice about my neighbour who I believe may have autism and seems to be non-verbal.

The boy/man makes a lot of noise (not a complaint) but sometimes his screams are so loud and sound like he is in pain and I become concerned. Is this something worth contacting social services about or should I try to strike up conversation with the neighbours and check in? They sound okay most of the time having conversations, listening to music etc but sometimes the noise levels worry me. 

Can anyone advise me or point me to a place where I can be advised? Thank you for taking time to read this,

A concerned neighbour 


  • janer1967
    janer1967 Member Posts: 12,359 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi and welcome to the community glad you have joined us.

    I would try and communicate with the neighbour first to see if you can identify anything or get any information .

    Of course it may not be evident if there is anything of concern by just talking to them. You say you think he is non verbal but then said you hear them having conversations 

    If you feel anyone is in danger then contact 999 

    It is a difficult one to deal with so you are respecting their privacy but making sure there is no reason for concern

    I have professional experience in HR within public,  private, and charity sectors.  If I can't help I will
  • SJS89
    SJS89 Member Posts: 5 Listener
    edited July 2020
    Hi thanks for welcoming me! :) 

    So when I say they have conversation , I mean the mother and father not the boy. I only hear noises from the boy and may have heard him saying something the other day but am not sure.

    I will try and speak with them if I see them outside again and just have a neighbourly chat and see if everything's OK. I haven't heard or seen anything that warrants a 999 call but I will if that ever happens.

    Thanks again for replying I just wanted to ask and see what people think xx
  • janer1967
    janer1967 Member Posts: 12,359 Disability Gamechanger
    Your welcome 

    I'm no expert and we dont know if or what conditions  the boy has but it could well be a symptom of his condition 
    I have professional experience in HR within public,  private, and charity sectors.  If I can't help I will
  • SJS89
    SJS89 Member Posts: 5 Listener
    Yes I feel like that's the case so I'll try and chat with them. I don't want to accuse anyone of anything but I want to safeguard him. Thank you
  • poppy123456
    poppy123456 Member Posts: 23,890 Disability Gamechanger

    I cetainly wouldn't contact social services. It could be part something to do with a condition they have. My daughter has Autism but doens't make any nosies. If she did though and a neighbour reported her for doing this then i wouldn't be very happy.
  • woodbine
    woodbine Community Co-Production Group Posts: 5,351 Disability Gamechanger
    Have to agree with @poppy123456 have a chat with the parents or make some discreet enquiries with other neighbours as well if possible.
    I am a person with epilepsy not an epileptic, my illness doesn't define me.
  • SJS89
    SJS89 Member Posts: 5 Listener
    I will take this all on board thank you! I think they've had visitors today and it's sounding more upbeat next door. But I'll definitely try and talk with/befriend them. Thanks again😊
  • LouiseH
    LouiseH Member Posts: 96 Courageous
    Hi @SJS89 I agree that being friendly and supportive is the way forward otherwise they may feel threatened and get defensive if they think someone is trying to intrude. I'm not sure how exactly to go about it but I suppose a "Hi" is a start.
    Good luck :smile:
    Louise Hesketh
    Community Champion
  • leeCal
    leeCal Member Posts: 4,257 Disability Gamechanger
    Our weather is always always a good talking point and most strangers will happily talk about it with ease! 🌪🌦⛈💨❄️ All in one day!
  • SJS89
    SJS89 Member Posts: 5 Listener
    Thanks Louise :)

    Haha true weather is an easy topic to bring up. 
  • davegregson40
    davegregson40 Member Posts: 81 Pioneering
    I would agree with the comments that it's not an antisocial behaviour or social services issue  but more likely the effects of a disability. The first point of call is always to engage with the neighbour on a friendly basis and talk and listen first and explain and say you're happy to support and engage 


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